SHUTCHINS
Canterbury, United Kingdom
Today, while my fiancé was showing me the finger guard on his brand new, very sharp knife, he managed to slice his finger open and throw the knife onto my leg, cutting me also. There's now a nice trail of blood on the carpet all the way to the bathroom. FML
Top comments
Lobby_Bee 18
Good, now you won't get lost finding the bathroom. Just follow the blood trail.
RichardPencil 32
Looks like that finger guard was a bloody failure! Get it? Or is my humo(u)r too cutting-edge?
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Comments (18)
TCRII 30
Maybe your boyfriend is not the sharpest knife in the drawer.....
davecross 11
Your fiancé is not allowed to use a knife ever again!!! Not even a butter knife
Glowworm56 27
Or Fisher Price knives.
ThrottleJockey 36
Or anything sharper than a shelled hard boiled egg.
Lobby_Bee 18
Good, now you won't get lost finding the bathroom. Just follow the blood trail.
milmac 9
Hydrogen peroxide will remove the blood from the carpet -- just make sure to test it in an inconspicuous spot first, to make sure it won't bleach the color out of the carpet too. You can buy it in any drug store for about two dollars a bottle.
MorganHex 28
rubing alcohol works without bleaching if the peroxide test does bleach your carpet
joshszz_fml 27
I'm simultaneously slightly impressed and mildly disturbed by the readiness of blood stain removal suggestions here.
Glowworm56 27
What is with the need to show off really sharp knives, machetes, and katanas? All that one ends up impressing is how much medical help will be needed afterwards.
RichardPencil 32
Looks like that finger guard was a bloody failure! Get it? Or is my humo(u)r too cutting-edge?
Shabnam Moghal 14
I think a lot of your puns are sharp and on point.
Dave_Davington 34
If his finger's still attached, the knife isn't sharp enough. True fact.
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
Oh. THAT's why we have a first-aid-kit on every corner in our school...
Bearsmomma 30
sounds like you're saying knives are a problem at that school. that's disturbing.
Emma1562 35
*has a guest* guest:”where’s the bathroom?” You:”just follow the trail of blood.”
tonyfan00 38
Imagine if the guard /wasn't/ there...now that would've been ugly!