Today, my dad walked into my school and joked around saying that he's going to shoot my boyfriend. We all laughed. Except my boyfriend. He was sobbing in a corner. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, our pregnancy announcement was ruined by my dad who thought it would be funny to grab my boyfriend while yelling, "You got my daughter pregnant, boy! I’m going to kill you!" It wasn’t funny, there was just an awkward silence, and now this precious moment is something I’d rather forget. FML
Today, my dad joked he’d have to fight my boyfriend to find out if he’s worthy. My boyfriend grew up abused by his dad and older brothers, and has a powerful instinct to fight back. My dad is now out cold on the floor and my boyfriend is in the corner rocking back and forth and crying. FML
Today, my boyfriend met my parents. Within minutes, my dad managed to verbally sever his balls and reduce him to tears, "just for fun" apparently. FML
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML
Today, I introduced my dad to my boyfriend. I gave my dad the middle finger and he thumped me on the head, as we've been playfully doing for years. My boyfriend got all mad and tried to fight my dad. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend called my parents to let them know I broke up with him. He was sobbing. FML
Today, I heard my boyfriend talking with my father in the backyard. I thought he was asking for my hand in marriage. He was actually telling him about his plans to break up with me. FML
Today, my dad threw my boyfriend into the street naked. We weren’t even having sex, I was fully dressed in the kitchen, and my boyfriend was showering after his rugby game. My dad is also his teammate, and it was all a stupid prank by the team. I hate jocks sometimes. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up to take me on a date. Just as we were about to drive away, my dad ran out of the house in his underwear and started yelling that he'd kill my boyfriend if I wasn't back home within the hour. FML
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Top comments
katiehaitch 21
Why the hell would you laugh at something like that? Your country isn't exactly known for its lack of school shootings. And your boyfriend deserves better than being mocked for his reaction to a threat of bodily harm.
jessmakesamess 9
I'm surprised he didn't get tackled to the ground and hauled off to jail
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Comments (27)
Mightytall 35
What kind of a pansy is that boy? 'murican dads have been making that joke for ages. Unless your dad is a lunatic and if your boyfriend treats you right, he should have nothing to worry about. I've heard much worse, like the buddy with a backhoe story and very vibrant descriptions of mutilation to make the boys keep their sticky little hands off the prize. Heck, if I had a daughter I'd be demonstratively cleaning my shotgun in front of the boy if she got picked up for a date.
Xandriajoy10 18
Why is it alright to say this about a boyfriend? I can assure you if a guys dad threatened to shoot his sons girlfriend, they'd be charges pressed. Threatening boys isn't ok. No one jokes about killing women, because that'd be offensive and rude
kayayye 22
your dad is insane and wth why would you laugh at that.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
How is that funny? I knew a guy that got suspended from school recently for making a joke like that. Understand that those kind of jokes can be taken seriously.
isaak_sanchez 18
This isn't a fml its a fhl
shannon2348 14
Are you kidding me? With all the school shootings there is absolutely nothing funny about this at all.
EricW 4
your dad is a moron. this is no laughing matter