Today, my 6 year old daughter asked me if the tooth fairy was real. I said yes, and she said she wanted to try to catch her. Later, she pulled out a tooth and put it under her pillow. I came in to take out the tooth and replace it with money. There were mouse traps behind her pillow. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML
Today, my daughter lost a tooth. I wanted to make the Tooth Fairy experience extra special, so I dipped her doll's feet in paint to leave “tracks” from the window to her bed. As I was adding the finishing touches and spreading glitter, I tripped on a toy, faceplanted and lost my own tooth. FML
Today, I caught my young daughter eating candy after brushing her teeth. Angry, I asked her if she wanted all her teeth to fall out. She smiled and said, “Yes!” FML
Today, my 5 year old swallowed her loose tooth, which she was going put under her pillow for the toothfairy. My wife then told her 'what goes in must come out'. And now everytime she does number 2, she makes me dig for her lost tooth. FML
Today, I was woken up by my 5 year-old daughter hitting me with a pillow because she had a dream that I was using her toothbrush on the dog. We don't have a dog. She is now refusing to brush her teeth. FML
Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML
Today, I woke up to find my 6-year-old daughter had duct taped me to my bed and dropped my wallet down the toilet. Well played. FML
Today, I had mice in the house and had to kill them with mousetraps. I pulled a trap out with a dead mouse and my four year-old son saw. Mice are his favorite animals, and now he won’t speak to me. FML
Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML
Today, my daughter, who can pick up spiders and even snakes without flinching, screamed at the top of her lungs because she saw a mouse. Um, what? FML
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Top comments
olliec 0
Smart kid. haha
Soup_fml 0
Now I have this image in my head of a little girl waking up to find a decapitated fairy under her pillow.
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Comments (170)
HWR924 0
YDI for lying to your child. I used to believe in this shit and I was ******* pissed when I found out it wasnt real. Parents should always tell the truth to their children. They should understand that we would hate our parents lying to us just like they would hate it when we lie to them.
Wuzzgoof 0
Lying to your parents is wáy different than your parents telling you the toothfairy exists. And, obviously I don't know your life story, but if you ''hate'' your parents for telling you the toothfairy exists, you have been bathing in ignorance and spoiled-brat potion for too long. *cough* I mean, *respectful comment*.
Tapes 0
I agree with Wuzzgoof (love the name, btw). You seem like a spoiled brat. My grandma was the first one to introduce me to the toothfairy tale. I loved it. I'm glad that she gave me that memory of my childhood. If you were serious about being '******* pissed' then you are going to need a lot of therapy in the future. Also, you seem like the type of person who would dump water on Christmas carolers.
fudrick 0
How is lying to your parents different then them lying about the tooth fairy? If anything, it is worse for the parents to do that, because young children are very impressionable, and you are basically telling them that it is okay to lie, and that they can't trust their parents.
Icarus3 0
lol, I like the way that kid thinks
TehKing87 0
you are a liar. you would have fingers missing if it went off
Vurban 0
Where the hell do you get your ideas about the physics of a mousetrap? You wouldn't be *missing* fingers. Broken? sure. Shattered? Likely. But *SEVERED*? Please tell me you're joking...
smlife1221 0
I was told a similar story by a man in a bar in Nashville!!!!! You liar!
SickSickSick7511 0
Why did you go in to her room to replace the money? Shouldn't you just leave it to the tooth fairy?
brutal_banger 10
least she's creative bout catching things
Twi_lover_EC 6
At the age of six I was told the tooth fairy wasn't real....
Emilyroxx 3
Well played.
zach055 23
YDI for lying to your daughter about the tooth fairy
superninja550 0
i wish i thoughta that i used a trip wire an then when i was sleep walking i triped over it.