Today, it was another stressful day of watching servicemen at my job trying to figure out what broke an extremely expensive and essential machine. I'm just waiting for the day they finally discover the earring I dropped into it about a week ago FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at my first day of my dream job, I dropped a delicate $700 piece of machinery on the ground. FML
Today, it's the eighth day in the last two weeks that my job has kept me late, while working with broken equipment. It's been longer than that, but I started counting two weeks ago. I've been cussed out because of the broken equipment too. No amount of money is worth not seeing my girl. FML
Today, the maintenance workers finally came to my apartment to fix the shower-head that kept falling off the wall. I was annoyed because they had replaced it a few weeks ago and since then, it'd been a problem. They went into my bathroom, turned the shower head around, and left. FML
Today, I was at work, nonchalantly spinning my keys around my finger when they flew off and hit a glass cabinet. Broken glass showered passing customers. I don't think I'll have a job to go to tomorrow. FML
Today, I was working the cash register. While helping a customer with her groceries, my bra snapped. I then had to ask my male boss if I could staple it back together. Thirty minutes later it snapped again. I then had to explain to my boss that I was too broke to buy a new one. FML
Today, I chipped my front tooth on a hazelnut. Yesterday, my car broke down because the mechanic did a shit job, and oil leaked all through the engine. I'm waiting in fear of whatever expensive thing is going to happen tomorrow. FML
Today, in the process of leaning over the sink to close the drain so my diamond earrings wouldn't fall in as I put them on, I dropped my diamond earring down the drain. FML
Today, while at work, I cringed as I noticed my caveman colleague frantically digging into his nose and then continuing the use of his computer. I work in IT support and will be rebuilding his computer and reinstalling all his applications in 30 minutes time. FML
Today, I nearly lost a hand at work, because a supervisor decided to remove a 'useless' safety guard on a machine despite my warnings. He doesn't understand why I'm so upset with him. FML
Today, after a long day of working on my feet, I came home looking forward to soaking my aching feet in a foot spa. When I was pulling the machine out of a closet, it slipped and came crashing down on my feet. It broke. So did three of my toes. FML
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Top comments
Tripartita 45
You know, Van Gogh had a way of dealing with stress that I think would really help disqualify you as a suspect if the earring is ever found…
SnapeIsGood 20
I'd say you should go to your boss and tell him that you may know why the machine is broke. Just say that you've realized that there's one of your earrings missing. He won't be too hard.
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Comments (46)
Therebepeople 13
On purpose or on accident?
thatweirdasian 22
Yes, I'm sure OP dropped her pearl earring on purpose, you know, because she obviously wanted to get fired!
dovahking 4
You don't know if it was pearl it could have been a cheap earring
Tyrax 16
"By" accident. Not "on" accident. *proudly waves Grammar Police badge*
queenofirony 12
Please see OP's name.
cootiequeen4444 11
are.. are you a time traveller? How did you know Johannes Vermeer? And more importantly what machine is this expensive and essential machine? I'm kinda curious. &&Why didn't you say something when you first dropped the earring? Is the reason it broke have anything to do with it running after the earring fell in? Because then maybe if you said something immediately the servicemen would be there fishing out an earring so the machine could be used rather than fixing it? I'm a little uncomfortable tbh as it seems like you are currently being paid to cost your employers money....
TheNoNameGuy 20
someone explain how this has to do with time travel?
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Vermeer painted The Girl With The Pearl Earring.
SnapeIsGood 20
I'd say you should go to your boss and tell him that you may know why the machine is broke. Just say that you've realized that there's one of your earrings missing. He won't be too hard.
Tyrax 16
I like this suggestion! Which would have worked if OP had done it the next day. How is she going to explain it took her a week to notice she didn't take off an earring? (Unless this is totally possible. I don't wear them, but unless it is a clip on, I imagine taking them off bears some notice)
catlover5299 18
#38 I wear earrings that are not clip on, and I've had them fall out.
moodyreallyrocks 27
Sad..
Tripartita 45
You know, Van Gogh had a way of dealing with stress that I think would really help disqualify you as a suspect if the earring is ever found…
sturschaedel 27
So you saw that documentary, too? I like the part where he wrapped said piece of meat in some paper and gifted it to a cleaning lady of his favourite brothel.
GhanArch 6
You do realize that "cleaning lady" is a euphemism there? :)
CliffyB03 28
This joke is extremely under appreciated. You deserve way more likes
sarcasmismyno1 22
Definitely come clean. It's better than being caught after the fact.
ArizonaRain001 12
Buy another set of them, wear both and say it isnt yours.
Gazerman100 13
Aren't you supposed to avoid wearing jewelry around heavy machinery?
grayguysarehot 12
Only dangly jewelry. Earrings usually aren't inherently dangerous around machinery other than MRI machines.
Lalala579121 28
It really more depends on the company how that is handled. For example my company doesn't allow earrings or any jewelry at all. I would imagine if OP's was like that they would have been seen and OP would have been told to remove them.
extremereviews 26
Gotta say YDI, you know what the problem is and can help them get it fixed and business back up and running but you choose not to
N7Com 7
just say something along the lines of "you just realized one of your pearl ear rings is missing and point out your close proximity to the machine and say its possible it could have fallen in while working " which phrases it to save both your ass and the companies