Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML
Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML
Today, I went to get my spray tan before my semi-formal. After I applied lotion to the bottom of my feet as instructed, I went in the booth and began to start the tanning session. I lost my balance and fell right as the machine began to spray. I look like a spotted cheetah. FML
Today, I went to a tanning salon. I guess nobody mentioned that you have to lift your fat rolls or you'll end up with weird stripes where the spray never reached. FML
Today, after I sent around 300 entries to a competition hosted by a deodorant company where the main prize is a trip to Hawaii, spending around 5 hours sending the entries, I won a deodorant. FML
Today, I faked my age to win a colouring competition. I just turned 19. FML
Today, I got a spray tan for homecoming. While I was dancing, I got really sweaty and the spray tan rubbed off on the guy's white tux. FML
Today, I tried a self-tanner in an attempt to rid myself of my ghost-white legs. I got my wish, but instead of a warm golden tan, I have red, swollen, lobster-like marks sticking out from the bottom half of my torso. FML
Today, I attempted to bleach my body hair so I wouldn't have to shave. A little while later, I realized that I'd also succeeded in bleaching my skin, which was incredibly noticeable. I'm hosting a pool party this weekend. FML
Today, I decided to get a spray tan. I'm now more orange than the current president of the United States. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
expertsmilee 26
Sell it to a white person.
silvercamaro 22
Not for long you're not. I'm kidding that'd make you look like a corn dog
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (127)
DQueen1726 9
You still beat them hoes ??
jayisforjessica 2
???
jgw_it2 12
I hope you know you can just get your face airbrushed and that could replace you wearing foundation if you do wear makeup. (:
nitrog100 21
I really hope the prize was given publicly, just so the awkwardness could fully sink in.
oceaneyes213 21
Just dye your hair green and walk on your knees, you can be an oompa loompa.
daddysgirl8 21
You could use it to even out your skin tone. Or you could trade it to someone for something else. Maybe your friend has something you want? Or BAM! You have 10 gifts to give away for birthdays/holidays that you didn't have to pay for. AND YOU WON A COMPETITION! :D
B6LLT 14
sell 'em
FMLGUY254 1
DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY YOU COULD MAKE?
Saraishi 25
.
amadisdemitrius 5
Sell it to a white person: "This shit really works!"