Today, I went to the self-checkout line at Walmart. When I tried to pay, the cash wouldn't go in, so I stood there trying to cram money into the thing that's supposed to take your money. What I didn't realize was that there was a sign up top that said: "No Cash. Cards Only." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I used the self-checkout for the first time. I didn't see a slot for bills, so I tried to put them in the coin slot for a solid three minutes. There was a huge line behind me, silently judging. FML
Today, I was paying for groceries when the cashier asked if I wanted cash back. I said yes and handed over my card. She stared at me and said, “You're using a library card.” I'd pulled the wrong card out of my wallet. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. My checker was very hot. When it came time for me to pay, I swiped my debit card and the machine kept rejecting it. Sure that I had money in my account, I did it again, before the cute checker informed me that I was swiping my driver's license, not my debit card. FML
Today, I had an extremely embarrassing moment when I tried to pay my restaurant bill. First, I tried swiping my card, only for it not to work. After the cashier suggested I insert my chip card, I tried putting it on the bottom, only for it not to be there. I finished by putting the card in the proper place upside-down. FML
Today, at a self-checkout, I scanned all my items, bagged them, and left. Only when I got outside did I realize I had completely forgotten to pay. I then noticed that security was running to stop me, and I had to explain that I wasn’t a thief, just an idiot. FML
Today, I went to Walmart to get some acne cream. As I approached the register, I looked in my wallet for the money. The cashier saw that I didn't have enough money, and before I could say anything, he goes, "Just take it, I've never seen anyone who needs it this much." FML
Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML
Today, a woman came up to my cash register, where I was struggling with the cash, and asked if we took cash. FML
Today, I went shopping on my only day off. The only aisle open was self-checkout. I'm a cashier. FML
Today, I was using self-checkout at the grocery store, and the machine flipped out and started randomly announcing, "Please wait for assistance." No one came to help, but the machine just kept loudly repeating it until everyone stared at me like I was trying to steal grapes. FML
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Top comments
zachthesadcat 6
On the bright side, it didn't steal your money like nearly every vending machine I've encountered
AshleaJstudent 16
Thereʻs no good way to break this to you. Youʻre one of the People of WalMart.
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Comments (57)
zachthesadcat 6
On the bright side, it didn't steal your money like nearly every vending machine I've encountered
adrianh1090 12
How can you not see that a card is way smaller than a dollar bill. -_-
amphetamin3 17
What? The money-taker-thing was obviously not working. It's not the size of it, silly. Lol.
Rainhawk94 27
This reminds how at work we have.4.self check out lines but they open at 7am. Every single day there's always that one person who ignores the close signs and tries scanning their items in the morning and ask why its not working
ThatInvisibleBoy 7
Hopefully you didn't have to much stuff you could just go to another one.
Kkmars 22
*Too
NineInchSacks 11
Did you even read this FML?
Polynomial 28
I an legally blind. Whats your excuse? Didn't you Notice, the slots are completely different.
falon142012 22
#3, I'm pretty sure the machine still had a place for cash as well as cards, but isn't accepting them for some reason. Thus the sign saying "this machine will only take cards" even though it still has a cash slot.
Kristoffer 35
#17, that would be correct. These things break down all the time, not that they're fragile but they do get a lot of use and wear out, as all mechanical devices do.
rocker_chick105 31
Just because you're blind, you have no excuse to be a jerk...
Polynomial 28
I'm sorry. I guess my joke came across as a serious insult.
Polynomial 28
I learn something new every day. I hate those self check out machines, very rarely accessible.
JoshTheTacoMan 19
#3 Now you could type that comment using a Braille keyboard, but how could you read the fml?
tj4234 36
You can set your pc to read the page to you. You can also set your pc up to type what you say rather than use a keyboard.
HKCgrimmjow 15
Plus legally blind isn't completely blind, it just means you cannot make out objects without prescription glasses, so 3 probably had glasses on
Polynomial 28
I have a screen reading program called Jaws, it isn't the best, but it does read the screen. In this case, I used the app, with voice over. I do not own a braille keybord, but I do know braille. Blind people can use a regular keyboard to, in fact, we are typically very fast typists, because we cannot see the keyboard, to rely on our eyesight.
Polynomial 28
What PC is this? Most screen reading technology costs about a Thousand dollars or so. Also, most blind people have no challenge using a regular keyboard.
Polynomial 28
Legally blind is not necessarily mean glasses. It can be anyone of 1000 I conditions. I personally cannot use glasses, and rely on a white cane.
w_pony_4ever 15
Haha well it's better than it being completely broken OP! I hope nobody saw you!
AshleaJstudent 16
Thereʻs no good way to break this to you. Youʻre one of the People of WalMart.
ileenefudge 29
My condolences to OP...being someone of Walmart is not the best thing to be known by...
renjisgirl12 22
Always double check for signs before going up to the machine - just in case exactly this happens and you look like a fool! It happens though, you just gotta keep your head high and pretend it never happened lol
JustBeingAwesome 22
Don't feel bad op, there's too much weird stuff going on in walmart this isn't anything embarrassing.
ninjuh_wingman 29
No it's still pretty embarrassing. It's just not as weird as some of the other stuff you see going on at Wal-Mart.
chutney_02 22
#7 I agree, haven't you ever seen that clown that hides from dumb people? Oh wait...
tweetypie 18
Reading is fundamental.
drewflav 17
I get this on a daily basis at Safeway. Our self-checkouts are not yet programmed to take the new Canadian $5 and $10 bills and we have signage posted at every one to that effect. No one reads it, and plenty of people bitch me out when I point it out to them. The story really should read: "Today, I was working as the self-checkout operator at Walmart. Yet again, a stupid customer couldn't read the big signage saying that cash wasn't working and I got bitched at for his stupidity. FML."
olpally 33
You are the perfect customer to be shopping at Walmart op. Lol.
Bano360 25
Not just Walmart. In the shop I work in, when one of the self-service breaks and only takes cards. Even when you tell someone before they use it, the machine tells them too. A lot still try to use cash.
ihavenolifehaha 16
Well, now we know why you shop at Walmart.