Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the grocery store. My checker was very hot. When it came time for me to pay, I swiped my debit card and the machine kept rejecting it. Sure that I had money in my account, I did it again, before the cute checker informed me that I was swiping my driver's license, not my debit card. FML
Today, at a supermarket self-checkout, I loudly complained to the machine, “Why won’t you scan, you useless idiot?” An employee walked up behind me and said, “You need to press ‘Start.’” FML
Today, I was using self-checkout at the grocery store, and the machine flipped out and started randomly announcing, "Please wait for assistance." No one came to help, but the machine just kept loudly repeating it until everyone stared at me like I was trying to steal grapes. FML
Today, I was paying for groceries when the cashier asked if I wanted cash back. I said yes and handed over my card. She stared at me and said, “You're using a library card.” I'd pulled the wrong card out of my wallet. FML
Today, I spent twenty minutes helping an elderly man figure out how to use the self-checkout. When we'd finished, he smiled, thanked me, then walked away… without paying for any of his groceries. The cashier assumed I was with him. FML
Today, while working as a cashier, I was flirting with this cute girl. When I asked her if she had her store card she said, "No", paused, then said "Can I give you my number?" I said, "Sure, that would be awesome, do you want mine?" She said no. I didn't know I could just enter the card number. FML
Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML
Today, I went to the self-checkout line at Walmart. When I tried to pay, the cash wouldn't go in, so I stood there trying to cram money into the thing that's supposed to take your money. What I didn't realize was that there was a sign up top that said: "No Cash. Cards Only." FML
Today, I was waiting in line for what seemed like forever at the only open lane at the grocery store. The guy in front of me took his sweet time and had multiple cards rejected, before finally pulling out a $100 bill and demanding exact change. He was buying a carton of milk. FML
Today, I had an extremely embarrassing moment when I tried to pay my restaurant bill. First, I tried swiping my card, only for it not to work. After the cashier suggested I insert my chip card, I tried putting it on the bottom, only for it not to be there. I finished by putting the card in the proper place upside-down. FML
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Top comments
null_fml 11
Congratulations! You are EVERYTHING customer service industry workers hate.
ZawWry 0
You claim the machine is stupid,but it is YOU who is stupid.
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Comments (52)
crankyadam 0
FIRST
famo5 5
Oh **** off.
crankyadam 0
Now, even if I am a complete idiot, that doesn't give u reason to swear!
powersmoke 0
Woman logic at work here.
Feverrotes 15
I'm sorry I have to reply to #1 just to put this at top but so the message gets across. There's been at least 2 f***ing FMLs in the past about some dumb chick swiping her card in front of a hot register dude and not getting and feeling humiliated. At least the wording is different this time, but this isn't a f***Ing FML and it's almost the exact situations as the first 2 lame FML cases that went through. Considering how the last one was posted on this site with the same wording (word for word) the first FML about register card swiping BS, I don't expect the people choosing these FMLs to be posted to actual read any and decide, but seriously, enough is enough.
kmow32 0
24 you just made my day!! your pic is awesome!
ariestiger15 0
Op that was REAL smooth #24. Ur a jerk
xxxNataliexxx 0
Adam STFU really do you see of anyone cares of your foray? Your comment is just gonna be marked as a spam. Haha OP wouldn't you have checked if the side was right first? But I agree your life sucks
foolishworkerbee 0
"stfu", says the girl who herself has posted what may be the most obnoxious comments i've ever read, over the course of two consecutive fml's.
alexg823 0
STFU
ariestiger15 0
Haha nice
null_fml 11
Congratulations! You are EVERYTHING customer service industry workers hate.
birds_fml 7
Exactly, I wish I could click YDI a hundred times! I've had stupid customers like this hundreds of times during my stint in retail!
ChaCerCam 14
It would be awesome if he said " I think the machine's not the stupid one."
xxxNataliexxx 0
First** ugh screw this iPod touches letters
crankyadam 0
your ipod touches letters, that doesn't make sense!
polico_wolf 0
he means "screw my "Ipod touch" s letters" meaning screw the letters on the ipod touch
overrandom 4
I don't want to.
ColdGold 6
me either.
CallMeHush 1
I'm starting to hate mine also. Spell check has also gone retarded.
quelbaby 0
yeah who gives a shit if your first.. when having a conversation in the shops or at a cafe with your friends and one of them says something important, is your first comment FIRST!!??? if it is your a ********
BeeSkwaird 0
His a ********? His first what? Think before you speak.
liveBabylon 0
Awww I'm not 1st :(
crankyadam 0
yes i do shout out first when replying to someone, if they like cheese.
xxxNataliexxx 0
Oh wow, Adam is just being a ****** thinking he's so cool, he's just wasting his life typing FIRST
crankyadam 0
Natalie, i think ur pretty :p
crankyadam 0
Natalie ur a hypocrit, you obviosly think you're so cool acting as though you're a superior human being, even though you must have judged me through a few sentances and ridiculed me, maybe I am a completely different person, with the shackles of society?
xxxNataliexxx 0
Ooo, WTF
xxxNataliexxx 0
No, it just annoys me when people say first : /
Rainhawk94 27
The FML staff should delete this story due to so many worthless comments