Today, I went to my favorite drive-in burger joint for dinner. As I was nearing the end of my burger, I grabbed a cup from the cup holder that I thought was filled with soda. Instead, I got a mouthful of dip spit that a friend left in my car. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went through a drive-thru and ordered a milkshake. When the cashier handed it to me, for some unknown reason I confidently grabbed the lid instead of the cup. Guess who’s now wearing the milkshake? FML
Today, whilst on a road trip with friends, we stopped at a roadside diner for lunch. I ordered a chicken sandwich and when it arrived, I took a huge bite out of it, only to realize that it was still completely raw in the middle. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I really like. Midway through dinner, I felt something stuck in my teeth and, trying to be discreet, attempted to remove it. In the process, I flicked a piece of food across the table and it landed in his drink. He looked at it, then at me, then sighed. FML
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
Today, I was leaving the car wash when I saw my friend walking on the sidewalk. I pulled over next to her and asked if she wanted a ride. Only after getting a face full of the soda she was drinking did I realize I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
Today, at a party, a fly flew into my mouth. I spat it out, and in an effort to wash my mouth out, I grabbed the can of coke that was on the table next to me. Apparently people had been spitting in there and using it as an ashtray. FML
Today, I was with my friends at Burger King. While we were eating, I placed my cellphone on the tray, not realising that I'd left it there until after I emptied my tray into the bin. When I got it out of the trash, it was covered in soggy, sticky garbage. FML
Today, I was driving with my mom. She had some soda with her from earlier, and even though it was probably warm, I was thirsty. I ask for a sip, she hands it to me and says sure. And I get a mouthful of ash-and-cigarette-butt-filled soda. Apparently she didn't feel the need to mention this to me. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant for a second date. As we were eating, a piece of food got stuck in my teeth. I tried to discreetly remove it, but ended up spitting it across the table and onto my date's glasses. FML
Today, on my lunch break, I was walking to my car balancing 3 tacos, soda and napkins. A gust of wind blew my napkins up the street. In my attempt to catch them, I tripped onto the sidewalk. The tacos landed inside a car. Its owner came out just in time to see me standing next to their dash covered in salsa and lettuce. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Keyman1212 14
Dip spit smells terrible. You should have noticed.
Broc831 6
I think I threw up a little in my mouth... that sucks!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (171)
whatwhyhoo 10
YDI for being a dumbass. Who doesn't check first.
YwkyWy37 0
So what did you end up doing OP? did your friend hear about this?
brooks10101 1
I would have to murder him to appeas my anger i recomend the same
bubo_fml 11
Well...After all, it is saliva & can aid in the digestive process...However, after choking down fast food from a drive in, I would've reached for the alka seltzer instead...
sarliveasy 0
Omg that's terrible!
Soccerstar101998 0
Okay dip can only give you lip cancer and that is if you do dip with a canker sore so learn a little more would u haters I do it too and I am 14 I quit though(friends got me into it)
bleepbloopthis 0
Mmm tasty it just runs through you teeth and around your tongue.
gleek2013 0
Omg I did the same thing when i was like 4 or 5 but I just came from outside playing and was thirsty and my mom always left her diet coke bottle with drink still in them laying around well I went over there and chugged the "drink" the bottle was 3/4 full of dip spit when I got done with it. It was 1/4 of the way full and my dad watched me do the whole thing he picked me up and took me outside hung me over the porch railing and I piled my guts out. I've learned now to ask what that is before I pick it up btw that was my dads spit cup.
Hyman_Hunter 0
I can think of a type if spit that would have been a lot worse
Rach227 8
who does that in a friends car???