Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after a long night of partying, I was hanging out with this girl I really like. I was feeling really hungover, so we were just sitting at the park. She confessed to me that she's liked me since the day she met me. Out of excitement and hungoverness, I threw up on her shoes. FML
Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML
Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML
Today, I finally kissed the guy I really love at a party. He took me outside and immediately vomited. FML
Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML
Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML
Today, a completely drunk girl walked across the bar and punched me in the face because I was wearing the same dress as her, and her boyfriend had said it looked better on me. While I was screaming at her for being a stupid bitch, she puked all over me, wiped her mouth, and laughed before she passed out. FML
Today, during my beloved's birthday party, I had so much to drink that I puked all over the room. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend was throwing a birthday party and got very drunk. She needed help getting to the bathroom so I picked her up and walked her to the toilet. Assuming she needed to throw up, she instead takes a huge, monstrous crap right in front of me. I can't look at her the same ever again. FML
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Top comments
ReyEr9412 0
Reply to this. You know you want to.
Monikabug 9
It wasn't the smoothest response, but I am sure she understands. It was a party, it happens. Why don't you give her a call and apologize? That would be a start. Your life isn't over, you just need to take control of the situation.
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Comments (192)
Giorgio272 2
again we have another fml of "I am a douchebag who can not hold there booze. then I did something dumb to someone I like" simple answer. stop drinking so much. have control for once you idiot.
okieraider71 4
Ever notice how many bad stories in life start with "I was really drunk... "
Carina234643 0
yes, i agree. it takes an idiot to even drink that much. what did you think it was, water? dear god... Ditch your frat, and get a life.
solitarytrees 0
Yeah, fyl. but i'm sure if you manned up and apologized she'd prolly forgive you
LukeDog 0
fail
phantomzeroz 0
what a retarded ******
beastly35 0
YDI for getting so drunk.
JordynAlexis 0
In Soviet Russia, vomit threw you!
jacqueline101 0
OH WoW REAl SMART OP U qGET UR CHANCE AND U BLOW IT UP
sandra143 0
You should immediately report your previous and current English teachers.
R3kli3 10
Haha YDI