Today, I was watching TV when the Jim Beam commercial came on with the hot girl saying how she likes her men fat and hairy. My mom walked in and said, "See honey, you still have a chance." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was watching TV with my grandpa, and he stopped flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote landed on my stomach as my mom and grandma walked in. They yelled at me for being a pervert, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML
Today, I was watching a home video of when my mom was pregnant with me. She had a beer in her hand. FML
Today, I was cuddling up on the couch with my girlfriend, when my drunken mother walked in the room, slurred out, "Room for one more?" and leaped on top of us. FML
Today, I caught my mother telling my 11-year-old daughter that if she wants to be happy in life, she needs to start exercising now, because fat can creep up on you, and rich guys never marry fat girls with nice personalities. I was fuming. FML
Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like each other. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says, "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML
Today, I was watching ESPN. My boyfriend came in, bitched about "boring tv," so I handed him the remote. He put on a Lifetime movie. I must be the only woman in America with this problem. FML
Today, I was looking at my friend's dad's Facebook pictures because he recently posted a status update. I saw him at a bar with some ugly hooker that he was feeling up in almost every picture. After about 10 minutes of ridiculing and laughing at this ugly woman, I realize it's my mom in a wig. FML
Today, I was showing my hair-do from my high school prom from 10 years ago to a drunk neighbor. He turned to my mom and said, "Wow, she was a beautiful girl back in the day." Right in front of me. FML
Today, my mother and I were watching a movie. She got up to go to bed, and I blurted out, "Please don't leave me." Her response: "You really need a boyfriend." FML
Today, I was working at a grocery store when a couple of my co-workers called a code pink in aisle 22, which means there was an attractive woman in that aisle. After hearing about how hot she was, I went over to see her for myself. It was my mom. FML
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Top comments
Romaine_fml 0
Should have said: "Fat hairy men? Hmm, to be honest I think she'd probably fall in love with you first"
phatdaddy62 23
Oh Shut The **** Up!
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Comments (23)
NorfolkDude 2
I guess parents really do listen to beer commercial. Next thing you know they bought you some Axe, then you know you're screwed.
Mightyrif 23
Or with BudLight he's the most awesome!
threefitty25 0
oww...
8ranko 0
you deserved that one!!!...sorry but is true....
crazycar 0
#4 and #6 This is the United States of America. Alcolohol is our bread and butter baby! But serious dude, are you fat and hairy? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
capslockisgood 19
No, Jesus is bread!
necomni 0
Nice, thanks for the lol
Dr_Evil_Genius 0
That is one of the WORST commercials in television history. Not only are they pushing urine in a bottle, but they are pushing the mistreatment of women. I kept waiting for her to say "I take a good left cross and right upper cut when my man gets drunk". I am thankful for my girlfriend and what she has meant to me. Dudes really should find a nice girl and when they do, give back the positive effects that are bestowed upon them.
phatdaddy62 23
Oh Shut The **** Up!
dabears554 0
That's a great commercial! It describes me perfectly! I have a little bit fat, a little bit hairy back, I like to watch a lot of football and go out with the boys!
SuperStud 0
You still don't have a chance. She is just giving you false hope.
EternalStutter 0
ouch dude. that, well that just sucks lol
Romaine_fml 0
Should have said: "Fat hairy men? Hmm, to be honest I think she'd probably fall in love with you first"