Today, I was talking to my mom about when I have kids. I told her I may want two or three. She immediately cut me off and told me to stick to one, and that any more than that will be a burden. I am the second born child of my family. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my mom my husband and I were considering having another baby. She said, "No!" about 30 times. Then later she texted me that she insists on no more kids. I guess I will never have that bonding moment with her. FML
Today, my mom is threatening to disinherit me because I won’t have a baby. I have three siblings who between them have seven kids for her to obsess over, yet she calls at least once a week and always tries to convince me to get pregnant. Fuck off mom. FML
Today, I told my mom I was thinking of having a baby. She told me it was a huge mistake because children cost a fortune, make you miserable, and if she'd had her chance again she would have gotten her tubes tied when she was 18 and saved herself the grief. Gee, thanks mom. FML
Today, I adopted my second dog. When I called to tell my mom about it, she sternly told me that I was not allowed to get any more dogs. I'm 28 and own my own house. FML
Today, my husband and I got into yet another fight because he wants a second kid and I don't. One kid is enough for any family but he won't listen. FML
Today, my parents started nagging me yet again to have kids. When I pointed out that I already do, they scoffed and said that my five step-kids don't count. FML
Today, my mom asked me out of the blue if I was ever going to consider getting married. It wasn't until after the conversation ended that I remembered my siblings are all either single like I am, or incapable of having children. I am my mother's last hope of becoming a grandma, and she reminds me all the time. FML
Today, I tried to have a conversation with my mom. As usual, it turned into an hour long gush about how much she loves her grandkids. When I said, “You know you have children as well, right?” She goes, "Yeah but I only had them to have grandchildren for me!” FML
Today, my mother told me I should think about quitting school. She explained that the reason was because she didn't want me to be more successful than my older sisters. FML
Today, my mother-in-law asked me when my fiancé and I were going to start having children. When I told her we weren't planning on having any, she went on a tirade about how selfish and cold I am for denying her precious grandchildren. Now she hates me. FML
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Top comments
Qup 0
wow, way to hurt your kids' feelings. go ahead and have your kids but be careful about grandma. she can be a hurtful bitch.
mushoo_fml 0
Just imagine, 20 years from now we could be seeing an fml: "Today I was browsing old fml archives. I saw one by my parent, pandabear93. I am his second child. FML"
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Comments (56)
backagainbitch 0
**** off please never have kids
HahaYDI 0
Agreed, however your trolling skills suck.
mushoo_fml 0
Just imagine, 20 years from now we could be seeing an fml: "Today I was browsing old fml archives. I saw one by my parent, pandabear93. I am his second child. FML"
frikkinhannah 0
Lol 52. OP, FYL.
karlfootballer 0
hahahaha that really sucks
rosierosierosie 0
She is right though. I'm the third, and me and my sisters are really close in age. I would have hated to be my mum around the time I was born.
Qup 0
wow, way to hurt your kids' feelings. go ahead and have your kids but be careful about grandma. she can be a hurtful bitch.
tcnorden 0
Aww :( my mom was one of nine kids. #6
JarJarBinks_fml 0
I don't really see why this is an FML. Get over it, she raised you, didn't she?
Inked2009 0
Your an asshole that needs to get a life
sublime93 0
#7's right #8 take the stick out your ass
LocoChaz006 0
Kudos for that comment, #7. However, you lose any respect by paying homage to the most annoying Star Wars character with your username!
miamilano 0
ohhh yes you are
miamilano 0
ohhh yes you are
myhairynutsack 0
Have as many as you like. Maybe she had career aspirations and other life goals she never accomplished and it may not have been right for her in retrospect.
plexico 4
If I were you, I wouldn't push my luck by asking your mom who her favorite child is.
whatsmccraken 0
Being an only child sucks. I had no brothers or sisters to play with when I was young, not even a dog. Nor toys for a matter of fact, they thought toys stifled the learning process. My parents always wondered why I'm such a weirdo. Why I talk to the wall. Why none of the neighborhood kids want to play with me. Now on holidays, my parents still complain how weird I am. I'm 43, fat, and not married.
plexico 4
I'm sorry for you. I think it was your parents' poor upbringing of you rather than your only child status, per se, that has caused your current problems. We are raising an only child and she is thriving. She is exceptionally popular, well-adjusted, sweet, smart, talented and compassionate. I could not be prouder of her. She has far better social skills than her dad had at that age, and I had a brother and a sister. I like to think I've improved since then, but I have no doubt that my daughter will far surpass me socially. We've always had dogs in the house, appropriate toys and made concerted efforts to make sure she had plenty of playdates with other kids. I was worried when we got the news that we weren't going to have more children, but it seems to be working out great. I hope you can figure out a way to become happier. Good luck.
shalvius 3
i think, fact that your parents wondered why you are such a weirdo, have hurt your life more, then that you were growing alone. there is no weird people, only stupid social standards. everything is in your hands! btw i also have no brothers and sisters good luck
Intoxicunt 6
Aww, Plexico, you wanted more kids? I'm sorry to hear that. However, it sounds like your only child will always make you very proud, and you're lucky to have her. Some parents have 2+ bad children that worry them to no end, steal from them, etc. So, I guess you're pretty fortunate. I again say you sound like a really good dad.
plexico 4
no_hullabalo, Maybe you ought to go on vacation in, oh, let's say, Taiwan. They have beautiful resorts there that are known for being very friendly and parasailing. If you try parasailing, make sure you secure your swim trunks well, because if they fall off, it will be embarrassing. That ought to make you happy. Maybe you will share some interesting stories of your trip with us.
Intoxicunt 6
"43..fat...virgin", huh? Do you make yourself feel better by rubbing your nipples for people to watch while at stoplights?
capital_seven 0
I wasn't aware that "unmarried" = virgin
Intoxicunt 6
Oops. I didn't want to scroll all the way up, so I was summarizing it. The point remains, he is the guy from the nipple-rubbing FML.
the_stereotype 0
*virtual hug* because you sound like you need one
youthink_fml 0
Wah, wah, wah. She didn't say YOU were a burden. She said more than one kid is a burden. Stop taking things so personally.