Today, I was taking my grandma shopping, when she pointed at a pair of thongs and told me if I don’t start wearing them I won’t get a man. I've been married for 4 years, gran. Thanks for paying attention. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I found out my grandmother doesn't wear underwear when she bent over in front of me in her inappropriately short nightgown. FML
Today, some idiot introduced my grandmother to yoga pants. FML
Relationship specialist
Today, I attended a family reunion, during which my grandma gave me "relationship advice" in front of everyone. She's been married five times, and her longest marriage lasted a whole 6 months. FML
Today, my grandmother ripped her pants. We all got a big view of her pink thong. FML
Pervert!
Today, I walked in on my husband sniffing my sister’s panties from her laundry basket. He had the gall to defend himself and told me, “If you wore these sexy thongs and cheekies instead of them granny panties, I wouldn’t be doing this.” I wear “granny panties” because I recently gave birth to our daughter. FML
Stuck
Today, my grandma and her neighbor compared their sports bras in front of me. FML
Today, my grandma and I went shopping. When I picked up some shower gel, she started ranting in front of everyone that shower gel injures one's "lady parts" and causes infertility, and that she wants me to give her great-grandchildren. FML
Today, my mother-in-law started chasing my kids around her house to make them smell her freshly-washed underwear. They were thongs. FML
Tailored
Today, I went shopping with my grandma. Told her I saw a pretty dress I liked. She asked me who would fit in that? When I replied they have it in different sizes. She replied with, "Yeah but definitely not yours.". FML
Loveless
Today, my grandma called me to tell me that a couple of cute boys stopped by her house to borrow something. She told them all about me, and that I would be interested in them. My love life is so pathetic, even my grandmother is trying to hook me up. FML
Top comments
MrSassypants 34
This is really fun paradox. This is the first time I've seen someone say "if you have nothing nice to say then don't say anything at all" and then proceed to say something mean.
Comrox 19
Does she like your husband?
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Comments (20)
TomeDr 25
My husband's aunt had me decorate her 50th anniversary cake. While showing me photos of her wedding, she asked if I had attended it. I was 38 years old and had only been in her family 10 years. It was an early sign of Alzheimer's.
Mahcookiez 15
I think she's trying to say something
armattiuzzo 16
Im Australian and reading this I was like thongs? But I kinda got the idea it wasn't the type you wear in your feet
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
More importantly, did you get your husband by wearing a thong?
17jemstar 14
Thongs as in sandals or thongs as in bikinis?
mswim 27
The onset of Alzheimer's?
EarlFug 19
Well, she's correct that thongs are awesome..
KxHoneyCombxP 24
Maybe she has a bit of dementia
Nubsche 18
Plot Twist: OP is married to a woman.
wrenavery90 12
So did you tell her that? Is she getting senile?