Today, I was startled by my roommate marching a drunk man out of our apartment. Somehow he found his way in complete darkness into the bathroom without alerting me or my dog next to the only door. He mistook the clothes hamper for the toilet. FML
Nexpecto tells us more.
Nexpecto 28
This is the most spot on reply haha! The scariest part of this whole ordeal is that I was awake but had my eyes closed and still didn't hear a drunk intruder come in. I'm a tetraplegic meaning that I have little use of my arms and none in my legs. I have my bed in the living room so that I still have things to do at night since I am bed bound. Because of my lack of independence, I have caregivers that come in daily to help with my needs. My roommate left the door unlocked around midnight so that he would not have to get up to let my caregiver in on Saturday morning. The last thing we were expecting was a drunk man urinating in the bathroom at 3:15 AM! My dog Bella makes the sweetest pit bull but worst guard because of how friendly she is. As frustrating as it it, we still love her. This was definitely the luckiest I've been in a long time and the last time the door is unlocked at night. If I had been completely alone that night there would have been absolutely no way for me to get his drunk ass out. Thankfully it was just a wasted man looking for a toilet instead of a crack head looking to get his next fix
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Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Top comments
patrickalamo 48
Time to start locking your doors...
extrasnipes 22
What kind of ninja is he?
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Comments (40)
cr500guy 11
could've been a pile of clean clothes
ShadowGenius 12
The same thing happened to me. Except I was the drunk guy. In my own house and I don't have a dog.
False_Stupidity 42
So, essentially the only thing you have in common with the FML was that in involved a drunk person and that you pissed or shat in your own laundry hamper.
fmlsams 27
I guess drunkenness allows ordinary individuals to develop night vision and dog whispering abilities. At least your roommate was on the ball, OP, or he would have been raiding your fridge next.
awkwardeer 26
YDI if you're one of those people who don't lock their doors. It could've been a lot worse.
CaptainBlack 18
You put your laundry hamper in the bathroom?
jay0627 8
that's a shitty situation
Livin_Like_Larry 29
Modern day ninjas- tricking your dogs and ******** in your clothing hampers
Ichiya 29
It might have been vomit after all drunk people tent to do this in the toilet as well.
Izabushel 65
OP you don't happen to live on the third floor do you? Because I heard a story very recently where someone assisted a drunk person home, and dropped them off in the bathroom. The front door was unlocked and they assumed it was the correct place. However they realised on the way out that they had accidentally taken them to the third floor, not the second which is where they should have gone. It would be amazing if this were the other side of the story.
kewpiesuicide 29
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caleb_9756 14
At least the clothes were dirty..?