Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, per my boyfriend's request, I bought some lingerie. He got so excited when he saw me, he ripped it off me right away. After we were done he used it to clean up. I essentially bought a $40 cum rag. FML
Today, I spent 100 dollars on lingerie. I put it on, walked out to the living room, and told my boyfriend to follow me into the bedroom. He said no, then pretended to fall asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend ripped my panties trying to get them off. Not off me, off himself. FML
Today, I wore my boyfriend's favorite shirt to surprise him and show him how sexy I look. He made me take it off and pay the bill for dry cleaner. FML
Today, I took a bath and dressed in a skimpy lingerie. I sat on the couch for an hour and a half before giving up and putting on my boyfriend's old t shirt. It was then that he decided to comment. On the t shirt I was wearing. FML
Today my boyfriend tried to be sexy and rip off my underwear. Instead, he bit a chunk out of my hip. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by dressing up in sexy lingerie. When I went to answer the door he was standing there with a shocked expression, his friends parked in the driveway had the same expression as well. He came to break up with me. He told me after we had sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to viciously rip off my thong. My ass crack is numb. FML
Today, I bought a new bra and panties and modeled them for my boyfriend. I thought he liked them, until mid-way through feeling me up, he decided he'd rather give me a massive wedgie. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Looks like you got ripped off twice.
obsydian_fml 3
That's always the risk you take with cute sexy clothes coming between you and a horny man. Look at lower price tags next time!
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Comments (126)
obsydian_fml 3
That's always the risk you take with cute sexy clothes coming between you and a horny man. Look at lower price tags next time!
MineIsBigger 5
looks like your lingerie worked TOO well
zakkyzebra 11
Why don't women understand you don't need sexy clothes to turn on a man? Hell, you don't even need clothes at all!
evilscorpi 29
lets be honest there can be sexy ones for $20, but for me $110 is overboard .....guess she really loves him.
DjeePee 25
Yeah, like love has something to do with the amount of money someone likes to waste... That being said, my sexy lingerie sets are cheap (H&M + sales = winwin), but I'm still happy my boyfriend doesn't destroy them. Can't imagine how mad/sad I would be if he did. But on the other hand, it shows that he really is into it, and it doesn't sound so nice to become mad/sad on him because of that. Solution: let him buy you another sexy new lingerie set. See if he's still going to destroy it.
YakuzaxGeneralz 9
Let's be honest: a ham sandwich will turn us on.
thiscrazything 1
That would depend on where the ham is placed.
capper44 18
#54: if i was that guy and had to buy the new once... I still would have distroyed it next time lol
nofearjenshere 12
There should be a 'one time use' tag on things like that.
MissHayleyJames 7
Target and JCPenney. It's all you need :)
omarzrgz 3
#54 it's not like he is destroying it while you don't have it on. He is seeing that you're doing something to turn him on and is trying to return the favor with great sex.
lizamaphone 6
If it was literally destroyed when he ripped it off, it was probably shit quality anyway! Buy either cheaper lingerie, or better quality.
awesomeness1004 3
OP don't complain you still got some
lolandstuff 8
Money well spent.
kaengelangeleyes 9
So true. OP should be happy. They did EXACTLY what they were intended to do ;)
platypus546 24
Take it as a compliment. He wanted you so bad he ripped your clothes off!
MonsterCommenter 4
Sounds like the recipe for a rapist. O.o.
ugwmii 0
it's just hulk-style.
GoingCommando93 14
Hm. I thought when you ripped something completely off of another thing, they would still be intact. Who would've known they'd get destroyed.
Hyperson 0
Doesn't matter. Had sex.
jesernoob 13
Under appreciated
koopaqueen 0
That's what you get for buying something that over priced!
phantumgrey 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You have no class. Nice things are expensive. I'd never sleep with a girl who wears target or Walmart underwear. That's trashy.
evilplatypus 39
"That's trashy" Says the person with a "guard your nuts" profile picture.
japtch 15
30- You're one of those assholes that thinks wearing more expensive clothes makes you better than everyone else.
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Well, you live and learn, right!? apart from #30...
RadioOctopus 16
30 hahaha in this economy? Good luck.
johnnysky 0
30 was being sarcastic.... Seriously, people.
xStaciexLynnx 15
30- If the woman didn't tell you, you would never know the difference.
MickGold 8
30- uhhh... Some people don't have the money to buy $110 lingerie. 3 is right, It's what she gets. Quit being such a douche and love ur lady for her, not her clothes and the price of them. Ugh, the nerve of some people! Lol ;)
hotPinklipstick 24
30- How do you know if it's from Walmart or Target? Do you check the tag of a girls underwear before you go out on a date? Honestly a lot of intimate clothes from both stores are just a sexy as Victoria's Secret stuff and a hell of a whole lot cheaper. If you are that shallow you need to be single. Like the country singer Grechen Wilson said "I don't need no designer clothes to make my man want me."
TheSmoothDude 10
30 - I don't think you're sleeping with any girls.
saxy1of6_fml 9
Haha that sucks
Colonel_Lexi 18
You probaly shop at Abercrappy & Bitch, 30.
Chad_the_Brony 0
You could've still looked cute for cheaper. He might not have been as excited, but it would save you money. IMO, less is best. If she is in just undies and a T-shirt to get my 'attention', that would get me going.
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
Even if someone can afford some over priced shit, they could spend the money on something more productive. Plus, you shouldn't judge someone by their clothes.
MissHayleyJames 7
I got some lingerie from Target for $18 the other day and wore it last night and my husband went nuts. I wouldn't buy it at Walmart simply because the quality isn't good, but Target is way better quality than that. On another note, I do have a few tops from Walmart that actually aren't poor quality. I also have Chanel sunglasses and a Louis Vuitton purse. I grew up spoiled ridiculously rotten and still never bought designer clothes for myself. I shopped (and still do) at Macy's, Old Navy, JCPenney, and Target. My stepmom got me my LV purse for Christmas and I only carry it so I don't hurt her feelings but it's ugly and something I would never buy myself, money or not. Expensive designer price tags don't make things any better than something else. The quality might be better and it'll last you longer, but some of it is as ugly as hell. Is better to save money where you can even if you're rich because one day you might not have all that money and you'll have no idea how to survive without it.
Redoxx_fml 22
Talk about foreplay
DontClickOnMe 28
That's a lot of money for lingerie. I'm sure he would have been just fine with you being naked. Plus, it's less work for him.
SPAIDZ 0
Not necessarily. I know lingerie gets me going better than if my girl just starts out naked. The slight tease and getting her out of it is all part of the fun.
MickGold 8
12- maybe so, but $110?! That's a little much. I think lingerie half that price could still satisfy.
DaRebelAngel 0
In the end you got want you wanted attention and really good sex so win win!!
perdix 31
Looks like you got ripped off twice.
Ha1r1nY0S0up 15
******* love you perdix
bjr1208 3
YEEEEAHHHH!!!!!!
memyselfandI07 1
Lmao, that was so creative. :-)
xxxemobitchxxx 0
You're hot
hamberry1 4
Bu dun tish
TheEpicMilkMan 13
next time goto Spencer's and get the edible lingerie ;) cheaper and more fun
gparsley 6
Oh yeah that is fun!
jizzwold 21
Except for the fact that it tastes like plastic asshole.
TheEpicMilkMan 13
@124 the one my ex picked out from there was strawberry so idk lol
TheDrudgeChild 4
131 - you're 15, what are you doing eating candy lingerie off of anyone?
TheEpicMilkMan 13
touche' lol
victoriakarsynn 0
It tastes like shit. Me and my best friend tried that out...
TheEpicMilkMan 13
i see :3
musicplaysall 5
Haha that's the best!
musicplaysall 5
Haha that's the best!
musicplaysall 5
Haha yummy!
musicplaysall 5
Crap I'm sorry I didn't see me comment get through
bunniex1 11
205/206/207/208 Haha your an idiot!!
DoubleCross 9
Doesn't matter had sex
Miss_Kristen 10
Still counts!
fth_morgan 3
a winner?(:
Dylman 6
Look into buying an iron suit next time I'd love to see him try to tear that shit apart
iChel413 6
Lol
japtch 15
Chastity belt and a flak jacket. :)
wokawokanomnom 5
Hell for sex any guy would find a way to tear that shit off lol
MickGold 8
Aww! #37, I was gunna say that! Great minds think alike, I suppose. Well, in that case, DEFINITELY! :)
alemi 0
What if hes iron man