Today, I was running late for work so instead of walking the ten minutes to the office, I took a taxi. The driver took the opportunity to share the story of his first sexual experience with a man. In great detail. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my first fare as a qualified taxi driver. The pride soon diminished as I was forced to listen to my passenger give a greatly detailed description of his recent colonoscopy. FML
Today, I was late for work and took a taxi. The driver told me he tried to commit suicide recently. I listened to him for 20 minutes, sat outside my workplace with the meter off. He charged me £5.80 and my boss gave me a warning for being late. FML
Today, my taxi driver kept falling asleep and swerving off the road, so I asked him if he was okay. He stopped and burst out sobbing about the long hours he had to do after his divorce, and his wife taking all he had. Long story short, I ended up driving him home and getting another taxi from his place. FML
Today, I fell asleep in a taxi. So did the taxi driver. FML
Today, it's my first day as an expat. Hoping to arrive early for work, I hailed a cab. The driver took it upon himself to take the scenic route and play tour guide, no matter how much I refused. Not only was I late, he turned violent when I refused to pay his $100 fare plus a "talent fee." FML
Today, I went home with my cute coworker. What started out as a little dirty talk and teasing ended with him admitting he was in a terrible emotional place, then sending me home in an Uber so he could sleep. FML
Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML
Today, I had to sit through 10 minutes of hearing a man on the tram tell his friend in explicit detail about all the filthy sex acts he'd like to do to me. His friend told him to take a photo to jack off to later. When I tried to tell the tram driver, he told me to "take it as a compliment." FML
Today, I was riding in the car with my new boyfriend. He had "something serious" to tell me. He started to emotionally confess his addiction to masturbation. In detail. The drive was two hours long. FML
Today, I was getting into a Uber after a long day at work. I opened the door, sat down, and started venting to the driver about my horrible day. Five minutes in, I realized I had climbed into a random stranger’s car. He didn’t even tell me; he just let me complain. FML
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Top comments
vaykay_fml 0
that was his way of saying "FU for hiring me for a 2 minute ride you lazy @$$"
mac_fml 0
i wonder if he tells that story to any other stranger, or just thought you were special enough to be the one to heat it.
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Comments (58)
aznbitch 0
its the philippines. you have any idea what itslike there it floods. its scorching hot sometimes. the traffic is really bad there. freakinn A. do your research before claiming pathetic. i live across the street from my school but its up a hill. amd i get a ride to school.
lalophobia 0
you : *opens door gets in;says "please take me to this and that building on roadstreet there. he : *starts driving; says "which reminds me i'll tell you ...that time i had sex with this guy .. is that it ? no ? well, how .... ? what the heck happened ? ... I think we're missing a part of the conversation here ;) after all, someone will need it to make that cartoon once ;)
luistd 0
aha side kick him and get out the cab xD
star2000shadow 0
Why'd you actually pay attention. I would of just sort of tuned him out and stared out the window. or read whatever you consist of work to show 'busy dude shut up' but like a couple of said you could of told him you weren't interested, and he might of gotten the hint to shut up.
brmgirl123 0
sounds like a good start to your morning. (;
Ninjasaurus18 9
Maybe you should have walked, lazy ass. Unless you had some heavy/large things to take with you. Or breakable things.
im_smart 0
Should of hit him with a brick
freshprizzle1 13
His first sexual experience was that short that it only lasted 10 minutes? He was probably upset and unsatisfied and needed someone to vent to.
loopdydoo 7
So he was basically "driving" you crazy?
DUBSTEPMON 13
Dude you're a fake at first you were a woman and now you're a man? Idiit