Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my mom. She was pissing me off, so I started screaming at her and causing a scene. I ended up falling all the way down the up escalator. Everyone saw and people clapped. FML
Today, while at the mall, I was traveling up the escalator on my way to the food court. When I neared the top, the handrail severely shocked me, causing me to drop a bag of China I had just bought, which fell to the bottom of the escalator and shattered. FML
Today, as I was stood on an escalator, my shoelace got caught in the step. Panicking, I tried to pull it out, but my shoe came off. I had to awkwardly hop back down the escalator to retrieve it while everyone around me in the mall watched. FML
Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML
Today, I embarrassed myself by screaming for help in a crowded mall when my shoelace got stuck at the top of the escalator. Someone behind me kicked the shoelace and it came out easily. FML
Today, I tripped getting on an escalator and instinctively grabbed the nearest person to steady myself. That person was a toddler. The mom screamed, I fell anyway, and the toddler just stared at me like I’d ruined his whole week. FML
Today, I was in an elevator, and the hot girl who lives in my building and who I have a crush on got in. She was in a wheelchair with a broken leg, I panicked and tried to flirt with her, and I said, "Nice chair." She replied, "Nice bruise" and punched me in the nuts. FML
Today, I was in the elevator with my female coworker and a very attractive teen in front of us. My coworker reached out and grabbed the boobs of the teen in front of us, and blamed it on me. I got yelled at, kneed in the crotch, and punched in the face. My coworker couldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, I was at the movies with my boyfriend when I really had to pee. I tried to get out of the aisle in a hurry so I wouldn't disturb anyone when I tripped, landing on the people in the row in front of me. FML
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Top comments
Imawhalerider 0
Girls don't usually get that defensive of their bf's. FYL
akalisser 0
I'd slap the chick back.
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Comments (107)
grlwitperlEring 0
Why would you wear uncomfortable high heels to the mall? Of course you're going to be walking around. YDI I love my heels but I only wear them when I know I'm not going to have to be on my feet the whole time
Ryanicale 0
Today I went to the mall with my boyfriend. We were on the escalator, and suddenly we saw this girl who was pretending to fall down. She grabbed my boyfriends butt, so I slapped her. Later, my boyfriend broke up with me for being a bitch. FML
Snazaza 0
hahahaha....buttocks
k_cool 0
so awesome.
Overcast117 5
If you can't wear heels without falling, you probably ought not to wear heels.
SirAwesome 0
YDI for trying to wear shoes that you couldn't handle. No man wants a woman who can't even stand up, let alone walk.
SookMauNoots 0
did you not see the two railings on both sides of you?
the_commentator 0
Don't wear heels you can't walk in to the mall. I learned that the hard way. Nonetheless, FYL. She didn't need to slap you. What a hoebag.
joethebiden 8
YDI for wearing heels at the mall. What are you, a hooker?
deaditegirl 0
YDI for wearing heels you can't walk in. Being unable to walk or even stand up is not sexy.