Today, I was offered a position as a school crossing guard. I have a $200,000 degree in Economics from a top 20 University and was offered a position to hold a stop sign and wear a reflective vest. I was tempted to accept. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was offered a job that pays far more than I expected, being a high school senior. My parents decided they aren't letting me take the job, saying I should enjoy my childhood. They're also not paying for my college, which is why I was looking for work in the first place. FML
Today, I received a call from a top-rated university accepting me into the program of my dreams to begin my ultimate career. Two weeks ago, I accepted a permanent, full time and legally-binding job position in my depressive hometown because the school had previously rejected me. FML
Today, I finally got an offer for a salaried position with the company I've been working for as a contractor for the past two years. They offered less than what I make now, but hey, benefits! FML
Today, I was forced into accepting a "promotion" for a position that pays less than what I get right now. FML
Today, I had my first job interview since graduating from university. The person who interviewed me informed me that not using my degree after two years practically makes it null and void. I guess instead of being a financial advisor at the company, I could always be a janitor there. FML
Today, I got a better job offer out of the blue, more pay, less work. I informally accepted and handed my notice as legally required. They rescinded the job offer. I'm now unemployed at the end of hiring season. FML
Today, after quitting my job to take a very attractive position with a competitor, I was told the position was no longer being offered. I'm now on my way to file for unemployment. FML
Today, I finally got the call from HR telling me I passed the interview and will get a permanent position, doing the same job I already do. Then they continued to say that if I accept, my pay will be cut to match “other employees pay”. I barely make it on what they are paying me now. I also have a Master's degree. FML
Today, I was offered a job. It only took me a year and 17 interviews to get an offer, and I have a PhD. FML
Today, my company decided to give me a second role, since I’m "the best performing candidate.” When I turned it down, they asked me to work half-time instead. I quit. FML
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Top comments
hahahapunk 0
does the marginal benefit exceed the marginal cost?
allmidnighteyes 11
STOP SIGN. REFLECTIVE VEST. Why the hell not? You can do like, awesome little dances, and tell the kids, "Don't stop!" as they're crossing the road, and only hope a passerby will cry out, "BELIEEEVIN'!" Orrrr, you can be one of THOSE crossing guards, and spank kids with the stop sign when they're being naughty naughtyyy.
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Comments (108)
vooper 0
MLIA.
jonnymohio 2
We all have to start somewhere. Maybe you don't have a job because you expect the world to hand everything to you on a silver platter because of your EXPENSIVE degree as you were so quick to point out.
genius_man16 1
QFFT
gsm_fml 0
Wow, you need a job and this one's beneath you? Grow up. Your degree doesn't mean you are entitled to a job.
I_am_stupid_also 6
YDI for not getting into a top ten school. Then you could be driving a bus.
kaleid0scopeEyes 0
You guys are either all in high school or bitter adults who never went to college. In the real world, you go through 4-8 years of (sometimes very expensive) schooling to learn a profession, which you plan to enter after graduation. Its not "whiny" to prepare and expect a white collar job after all this time and money invested in pursuing it. People don't drop 50-200k on college just to work at Walmart after. There are these things called "student loans" a lot of us will need to pay back. The people saying "get over it why do you want everything" are either still living with mommy and daddy and don't know anything about the professional world, or stayed at the local Burger King while all their classmates went on to college and better lives. Its funny how you all think the OP is an elitist whiner because he would like a profession in the field he has been studying for years. How pompous of him!
I_am_stupid_also 6
People who would take a school crossing guard job have no hope of working towards a real career, so they just grab what they can. For a bright recent graduate, the long term value of doing something serious with their time exceeds what they could earn at minimum wage. They would be better off in the long run doing volunteer work, or independent research or product development, where they get to practice some useful skill that will allow them to earn a real income at an earlier point in time.
nko_fml 0
It always takes time to enter a job market. Goes double (triple...) in a recession. And if you can make some cash in the interval, it's a good idea. It's elitist to think that plonking down money for an education entitles an individual to an immediate career. AH! I JUST BIT!
werzal 5
I went to Uni and have given up on finding a job for my qualifications in this day and age. I haven't lived 'with Mummy and Daddy' for 10 years! Don't make assumptions. I have been looking for work since my last job-thats about 8 months. I have either been told Im over qualified for 'this' position' or 'the position has been filled' Do you have any idea how SHIT it feels when you cant get work! Its not just me. #17 you are probably someone who has never had trouble getting work. Try living in the real world now-Just because you have a steady stable job-obviously-otherwise you would have a problem with this man. I would take almost anything that came along now! Maybe I made a mistake reading FML today! I wasnt accepted for yet ANOTHER JOB so FML!
plexico 4
With those credentials, you ought to hold out for Lunch Lady.
Intoxicunt 6
Damn you for beating me to it. Economics? Yep, you should accept it. If you know so much about the economy, you know it's pretty ******, and you should be happy for any job. On the bright side, you did help the economy by spending that much damn money to learn about it.
KillU2009 0
so what? three months ago i was a marine sniper, today im an armed security guard. **** you mr degree