Today, I was in the middle of a wank when my home's back door, which is always locked, suddenly opened and someone walked in. I’m not sure who was more surprised: me or the new maintenance guy who saw me wanking. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while at work, I went to unlock the washroom for a customer. Normally we don't allow customers to use the staff washrooms, so I was as surprised as the guy I found sitting on the toilet when I opened the door. FML
Today, I went to take a piss in a public bathroom. Somehow, I managed to completely jam the lock. After minutes of trying to get myself out, I gave up and crawled under the stall, at which point someone walked in and was very surprised to see me on the floor. FML
Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML
Today, I was at a party and went to the bathroom. The door was tricky to lock, but in my inebriated state I thought I'd managed it. Apparently, I hadn’t. Midway through my business, the door swung open, and in walked a group of people looking for their coats. We just stared at each other in shock until someone finally closed the door. FML
Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML
Today, I was getting out of the shower and realized I’d forgotten to lock the bathroom lock. I heard someone coming towards the door and panicked. I hid behind the curtain and tried to stay completely still, but my dad walked in, saw me standing there like a statue, and just said, “Oh, erm, I’ll come back later.” FML
Today, I had to use the restroom while at work. I had the choice of the stall with a broken lock, or the stall with a huge crack in the partition wall. Not two minutes after I sat down, I noticed someone peeking in. FML
Today, I was using a public toilet stall when the lock gave way, and the door swung open halfway. I froze, and the person who was washing his hands at the sinks looked at me in the mirror and awkwardly said, “I see you.” I muttered, “I’m sorry,” as he walked out looking like he'd seen a ghost. FML
Today, I was taking a shit in my friend's bathroom when his brother's girlfriend walked in. Nobody decided to tell me that the lock didn’t work. FML
Today, at work, I was on my break when I had to use the bathroom. I was on the toilet taking a dump when the door latch loosened and the door swung open. The little girl standing there took one look and screamed. Security busted in. My pants were still down. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
nitsud82 14
why was the maintenance guy just walking into your place unannounced?
BurnInDemonFire 39
Your back door was violated while you were wanking? That sounds unpleasant.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (13)
BurnInDemonFire 39
Your back door was violated while you were wanking? That sounds unpleasant.
PhoenixChick 26
The worst part was when OPs dad got so mad and jumped downt the guy's throat
BurnInDemonFire 39
And by sheer coincidence, "How Deep Is Your Love?" was playing on the radio at the time.
nitsud82 14
why was the maintenance guy just walking into your place unannounced?
TumblrweedPasses 11
Servers him right for just barging in
RichardPencil 32
Probably you. Maintenance guys see shit like that all the time.
Chazzster 32
If the maintenance guy came in without knocking or announcing themselves then it’s really an FML. If you were too involved in your “wank” to hear the knock and announcement that he was coming in then YDI.
honestjane 22
This right here. This is why you should always knock.
Tarlachia 33
Did you call in a service request for lube for your door hinges?
PenguinPal3017 19
My friend lives in an apartment and had to eventually get her locks changed because "maintenance" people kept coming in without notice. They would go through her stuff and even leave her refrigerator door open.