Today, I was in the hospital for 12 hours with unbearable stomach pain. Apparently I have a horrible infection in my intestines and colon. My mom is now accusing me of having anal sex and allowing a man to ejaculate into my bum. My great-grandma believes her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I felt an intense pain in my abdomen, so my mom drove me to the hospital. When we were in the waiting room, she rudely said, "It's probably an STD since you're such a slut." And then she left me there. It was a kidney infection. FML
Today, I woke up with extreme stomach pains. After being rushed to the hospital and having numerous tests performed, I was told my intestines were over-stretched with stool. I'm essentially so full of shit it hurts. FML
Today, I was feeling more and more sick, with significant pain in my abdomen. Nobody believed me, and my grandma told me to stop whinging and to eat something. I tried but started vomiting, and now I'm being rushed into surgery with an already necrotic appendix. FML
Today, after having been constipated for ages, I finally forced out a week's worth of build-up. The excruciating pain reduced me to tears, and my boyfriend refused to drive me to the hospital, because according to him, I must have had anal sex with someone. FML
Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was the flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML
Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML
Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML
Today, I had debilitating stomach cramps and told my mom, but she said she was too tired to take me to the ER. I had appendicitis. Thanks Mom. FML
Today, I was constipated and so desperate to go that I ate an entire box of laxatives. Now I'm in the hospital on a saline drip for dehydration and malnutrition, in addition to getting a massive enema and having the most agonizing shit of my life. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML
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Top comments
Harri20n 9
Anyone else wish the FML app would go back to the way it was before, without the horrible ads, crashing and comment problems?
TabooSushi 24
Because there is no other possible way for you to have gotten that infection, apparently... Geez, is your family highly religious, or just crazy? Cause that just sounds batcrap crazy.
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Comments (28)
foolest 7
they must be a pain in the ass
Harri20n 9
Anyone else wish the FML app would go back to the way it was before, without the horrible ads, crashing and comment problems?
swervelol 28
As I went to like your comment a pop up ad came up and redirected me. I couldn't agree more
BlueBaronBitch 22
*don't forget the profile screw ups!
BestOrginalName 22
This app is in its downfall. Whelp, that's what we, the consumers, get when the developers put money over quality.
LyricaSilvan 30
I've actually messaged them asking about that. The response I got was very impersonal and almost condescending. I explained exactly what issues were going on and asked if there were plans to fix them. The reply was more or less "we're trying but it's hard. What problems were you having, again?" I don't know if they just don't care or if the site/app is really so broken that they can't fix it. But it's a little bit ridiculous to have your Contact team be bland and robotic about things.
tibtak 20
I just liked your comment and it shows "4 - 1" instead of "41"
jojimugo 20
I used to read FML daily but now I come here maybe once a month and the adds chase me away
i_wuz_nver_here 31
Yes.
sweetbliss3 37
Yesss, it's horrible. they need to change it back to how it was.
trucker2 33
And here I thought my phone had a virus !!!!
BanjoCheeseGuy 26
I agree, left due to constant crashing and pop up ads every 2 seconds. Was gone for about a month, what the actual **** happened to the comment numbers? They're all 7,000 and other numbers, it makes 0 sense.
taterrtots 25
YES. SO MUCH.
stinkfire0971 20
it just made my phone restart itself
stinkfire0971 20
it just made my phone restart itself
Mindstormers 0
yes, but is HERE the place to complain? make your own post about it.
Yastafari 16
Guess his soldiers really do swim, huh?
URBeingLied2 23
What's wrong with a little anal cream pie? As long as you and your partner are adults and it's consensual.
URBeingLied2 23
consensual. Is the word that got cut off from my comment.
TabooSushi 24
Because there is no other possible way for you to have gotten that infection, apparently... Geez, is your family highly religious, or just crazy? Cause that just sounds batcrap crazy.
The_Bleeder 13
Is there a huge difference between religious and crazy?
TabooSushi 24
Not much of a one, no, but sometimes you find the latter without the former.
AirBusDriver 23
Hmmmm... perhaps mom and g-ma are speaking from experience.
jcash52426 5
While they are free to Believe that. I don't get why they don't trust you. But couldn't the doctor verify the reason that you are in pain and put to mom and grandmother at ease.
Miss_080 21
" we accepted you being gay, but do you see what happens when you choose to be gay? This." Hahahaha sorry man. I can almost imagine your great grandmas face / reaction to that .
S_Gnu 17
C diff? My wife had that and it was pretty nasty, though treatable. In any case, you have my regards.
yankesik 16
Ask them if they're speaking from their own experience. Just kidding, I'd want to get you disowned.
yankesik 16
I'd NOT want to get you disowned, don't look at me like that.