Today, I was in an elevator with my dad and several strangers. When the elevator voice said, "Going down," my dad excitedly said, "Man, I love it when she says that!" loudly enough for everyone to hear. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while in the elevator with the girl from my office that I've been crushing on, but never spoken to, I said "aren't elevators awkward?" After a long silence, she got off three floors before our office. FML
Today, I was in a packed elevator when I heard a loud noise. I assumed someone had farted, so I tried to discreetly turn around and hold my breath. To my horror, the loud noise was actually the elevator malfunctioning and dropping a few floors. I made it even more awkward by holding my breath, and the guy next to me asked, “You good?” FML
Today, I got stuck in a small elevator. It started to violently judder up and down after I pressed the 'Help' buzzer. The man on the intercom wouldn't stop laughing at how my voice was jumpy from the juddering movements before he called for help. FML
Today, I got into an elevator with a stranger. The silence was so awkward that I muttered, “Sometimes I pretend I’m on a reality show.” The stranger just stared at me until the doors opened. We work on the same floor. FML
Today, I got into an elevator with a really hunky guy. We exchanged polite greetings, then, for some reason, I tried to break the silence by saying, "Nice weather today, huh?" He nodded, but then I awkwardly continued, “Too bad we’re stuck in here.” He gave me a confused look as the doors opened right on cue. FML
Today, I was stuck in my apartment complex's elevator. I was shouting out for help when a voice came screaming, "This is the fire department." I was relieved until he said, "Just kidding." FML
Today, I got stuck in an elevator with six strangers. To break the awkward silence, I said, "At least none of us have somewhere important to be." One woman immediately started crying because she was on her way to her own wedding ceremony. FML
Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML
Today, I was in an elevator going up to the 32nd floor when I felt the urge to let out a fart. Feeling like it was either fart now or have appendicitis, and that it would be quiet, I thought no one would notice. It wasn't silent. It was loud and proud, and the cute girl next to me started laughing uncontrollably. FML
Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML
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Top comments
tipsypiink 0
sounds like a cool dad to me.
offtheheezy 0
Your dad obviously has a sense of humor, don't sweat it... too much. LMAO.
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Comments (119)
tehpizzahut 0
"Today, my dad cracked a funny joke in an elevator. FML." "Today, my dad beat me. My friend's dad cracks jokes in the elevator. I'm so lucky. FHL."
vaiho 0
I think ur dad's sex with ur mom was just came into his mind!
sonne31689 0
Hell yeah, that'd be a great day if my dad ever said that! hahaha
Shyman4ever 0
Your dad sounds exciting as ****. He's the coolest.
emikinz 0
and the fml iiiiiis ?
ASpocksky 0
Just sounds funny. Not bad.
yourstruly3465 0
There's one simply fix to something like this. You stare at him and state quite clearly "Sir, there are better things left unsaid"
hockey96 0
even so it's not like ur ever gonna see these people again
paramorelover78 0
oh wow thats funny i whould kill him if i where u i am still laughing haha
nygreenmachine 0
....so....?