Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
Today, before class I was trying to prove I can twist myself like the people on the front of my anatomy textbook, I got onto a table and twisted my ankles behind my head. Everyone seemed impressed until I farted so loudly that it echoed in the hallway. I couldn't get my legs unstuck. FML
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
Today, it was the first day of school, and I split my pants. In a full class. While on a stage. I'm the teacher, and I wasn't wearing underwear. FML
Today, during gym class, my teacher insisted that everyone should relieve some stress by throwing a basketball at the wall. I wound up and hurled the thing at the wall, it bounced back and hit me in the stomach. I began to vomit uncontrollably. Even my teacher laughed. FML
Today, I was messing around in computer class when somebody called my name from the hall. Trying to be smooth, I tried rolling my chair backwards out into the hall. The wheels wasted no time jamming and sending me crashing face-first into the floor in front of everyone. FML
Today, I was playing ball with my student during recess. My first attempt at throwing the ball hit him in the head. My second attempt hit him in the crotch. FML
Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML
Today, I accidentally farted in the middle of class. Thinking I got away with it, I just kept doing my work until some kid across the room says, "I could have done better." FML
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Top comments
Not_ROFL 11
You sat on your own testicles?
Scubanaut 13
I'm missing the adventure in this situation?
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Comments (77)
False_Stupidity 42
You're not a real man until you've experienced the excruciating pain of squished balls. Congrats on your new man card OP.
erichsalvesen 13
As long as I have a face, you will always have a place to sit ;)
vikky538 29
there is a reason underwares were invented.. now you should know...
yesnid 2
If you decided to go commando you should of realized things won't stay in place with nothing to hold them so you have to sit down more carfully. No sympathy from me.
PumkinSmasher 5
You must have some large testicles if they stick down far enough for you to sit on them
Dkman 11
Free balling is a glorious thing! But if your sitting on them, in school, you have 2 options. Go back to pants, and fail the journey that very few take. Or adjust them, so you DO NOT sit on them. Every guy here knows we adjust ourselves from time to time as do girls adjust their boobs.
popeizzy 9
because I'm free free balling. I have been doing it for years. it takes practice.
Wildghost123 13
reminds me of a south park episode
AcieMcG 21
Guessing you don't wear boxers then
Dookiepanda 2
You're not the only one that this has happened to!!!