Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at the grocery store when I tripped and knocked over a tower of Easter chocolate. The sound was so loud that everyone in the store stopped and stared at me while I tried to rearrange the chocolate bells, bunnies, and eggs. FML
Today, I decided to snack on some M&M's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my M&M's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the M&M off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an M&M. It was a dead beetle. FML
Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML
Today, I laughed at a joke and it literally took me a minute to realize that it was me they were making fun of. FML
Today, I was hiding Easter eggs around the house when my 7-year-old triplets woke up from their nap and saw me. They quickly realized that I am the Easter Bunny, and then they guessed that I am Santa. Now I have 3 crying second graders. FML
Today, I bit into a Reese's Cup that had been sitting on my desk for a while. As I did, half of a yellow meal worm fell out and landed in front of me, the other half was in my mouth. It was wiggling. FML
Today, I learned the horrifying implications of my memory not being what it used to be when I bought a tasty-looking chocolate bar, only to realize upon taking a bite that I'd bought one before and not liked it one bit. FML
Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML
Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML
Today, it was easter and I thought it might be fun to look for eggs with my little brother. My parents told me to take the ones in the higher places that my brother couldn't reach. All of his eggs were filled with candy or money. Each one of mine had a note saying 'maybe when you lose weight'. FML
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Top comments
kellster 2
Sometimes they're Ws, too! It's like magic!
bribubbles 10
Oops not meant to do that like 47 times
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Comments (159)
Fluffy_Fear 0
Hahahaha. This sound like me. I do dumb stuff like this all the time.
alex_vik 1
.......*facepalm*
Icalasari 0
#7 - I though YDI meant You Damn Idiot =/
courtgirl263 0
YDI. thats not an FML at all... its more like a retard moment
cyxx 0
hahahahhahahaha 5 fail unless you were being sarcastic 14 - haha. No it means you deserved it.
danpaulgo 0
wow good job. thats not really an FML tho its jus a sumwat funny story
shananigans 0
#14- Hahaha. In many cases it could very well mean that. But the official meaning is "You Deserved It". This doesn't seem like much of an FML to me, but hey it made for a good laugh. Now I really want some E&E's- I mean M&M's.
Nakedsquirrel 5
Hahahahhahahahahhahaha.. I'm not sure even I'd have said something that retarded, and I'm notorious for speaking without thinking it through.
Fabulousmeangirl 0
Haha don't worry, this is a great story. It sounded cute when i read it :)
scottyz1 0
Haha, sharpen up! Reminds me of a harmless funny: How do you confuse a blonde? Give her a pack of M&M's, and tell her to put them in alphabetical order.