Today, I was driving to the local market with my son. We approached a vehicle that looked just like my fiancé's. My son peered out his window and said, "Mommy, daddy's getting kidnapped!" It seems he was being 'kidnapped' by his new girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up and saw my new car was gone and my son seemed very shifty. When I questioned him with the cops, he admitted to taking it for a joyride and "leaving it" behind a derelict mall. We drove over. It was wrapped around a light post, completely destroyed. FML
Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML
Today, the police posted a description of the car of a child abductor. As everyone slowed down to read the billboard, I realized that the car's description and license plate were very similar to mine. After getting death stares from passengers, I got pulled over. Twice. FML
Today, I got locked in an old woman's garage for an hour when she forgot I was looking at the car for sale. When I got home, I told my mom and jokingly said, "First time I have been kidnapped!" Without hesitation she said, "Well, that makes it the third time." I had no idea. FML
Today, I was picking up my nephew from school. I waved when I saw him coming, shouted, “Hey dude!” The kid stared at me, confused. That’s when I realized it wasn’t my nephew, just a child who looked vaguely similar but who was now terrified. His actual mom gave me a look like she was deciding whether to call security. FML
Today, I was driving my little sister to school. She really didn't wanna go and was throwing a tantrum in the car. When we stopped at a red light, my sister notices a police man giving a ticket to another driver. She rolled down her window and screamed "Help me! I'm being kidnapped by a murderer!" FML
Today, while driving home from work, I saw my boyfriend mugging a woman on the sidewalk. FML
Today, my 15-year-old son told me that he and his new girlfriend are deeply in love and are meant for each other. The "girlfriend" in question? My fiancé's 12-year old daughter. FML
Today, I was driving to the grocery store with my 7 year-old son. As we were approaching a stop sign, I looked next to me and saw a guy with a triangle-shaped head. I said to my son, "Look at the guy with the triangle head." My window was open. So was his. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up to take me on a date. Just as we were about to drive away, my dad ran out of the house in his underwear and started yelling that he'd kill my boyfriend if I wasn't back home within the hour. FML
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Top comments
moony_fml 0
ouch, i wouldn't pay the ransom if i were u
24788 7
At least you caught him in the action. Makes it much easier to believe it.
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Comments (111)
zandar 0
your marital situation is confusing- are daddy and the fiance one person?
affa99 0
Premarital children? YDI
drinkupgorgeous 0
My cousin was about 13 years old when her biological parents got married, so that may be the case, I doubt it, though. But that so sucks, DTMFA, and find a new guy that will treat you and your kid right. And wait a while before deciding to get married to see if you trust him, because the leading cause of divorce is, infact, marriage.
ohhhhshizzz 0
Oh my hell, are y'all that dense? The OP could very well be "engaged" to the little boys daddy. You don't have to be married to father a child, hell you don't even have to like the woman you impregnate. OP: Ahh, I'm sorry. That sucks, but sucks doesn't even to begin to explain this situation. I've been cheated on before, but never by a fiance and with a baby in the mix. Ouch! I agree, YLIF.
nerdfighter4life 0
i swear i ever have really bad Deja-Vu or i saw this before....i think i saw this FML before.....im not crazy SHUT UP!!!!
bbobe900000 0
ah that sucks you can always count on kids to let you know what's goin on
Untoxicated 0
I agree with #65! Ofcourse a dad of a child can be fiance. Does every child have parrents that are married with eachother in this world? NO! I agree: FYL! Dump the guy! You deserve better!
xoxo_121 0
**** your fiancee
derriduh 0
**** your fiancee. **** the people on fml who are judging you for choosing to not marry him before you had a child together. no one here knows their story. it's quite possible that they didn't want to get married prior to having a child. maybe SHE was also against marriage and then they chose to get married recently. in any case, she wasn't unfaithful, HE was.
genius_man16 1
Your kid just saved you some real pain later on. Kudos to him.