Today, I was called by the counselor to discuss my "issues". She told me that other students had reported to her that they saw scars on my arms. I don't cut, I just have a hormonal and aggressive parrot who sees me as his personal tree. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had a rubber band around my wrist for too long, and it ended up leaving faint red marks around my wrist. My mom saw them, thought they were scars, and is now convinced I'm a cutter, "like the ones I've seen on the news," and won't believe my story. FML
It's not what you think
Today, this guy who likes me accused me of cutting myself. I asked him what he was talking about, and he said, "Don't lie, I saw those scars on your thighs when we went swimming." I have stretch marks on my inner thighs, and now I have to explain them to him so he doesn't think I cut myself. FML
Emo phase
Today, I picked up my cat and he went wild because I didn't know he was sleeping. I ended with with several cuts, and one on my wrist. Later, a kid in my high school saw my wrist and told my guidance counselor, who told my parents. Now everyone thinks I'm either a liar, attention whore, or emo. FML
Today, a man stopped me on the street. He said the stretch marks on my thighs looked like cuts, and asked me if I self-harmed. Before I was able to politely respond "No", he said, "I mean, I can see why you would." FML
Down the rabbit hole of assumptions
Today, a lady talking about the Bible came to my house. She looked at me and said I wouldn't need to cut myself if I had God in my life. Mom heard and did a thorough investigation of my body for scars. I had to bathe my rabbit last night, and he scratched me. They were from him. FML
Thanks, hun
Today, at work, one of my 6 year-old students, who has had intense speech therapy since kindergarten, told me, "I can tell you're hot, because you rolled your sleeves up." I was very pleased with his articulate sentence, until he said, "Your arms are hairy." FML
Bad women's anatomy
Today, my boyfriend noticed dark lines that look like scars on my inner thighs. He confronted me about them, thinking I was cutting myself, and now wants me to see a therapist because he thinks I'm suicidal. They're stretch marks. He won't believe me. FML
Today, on my break, I decided to be friendly and chat with a co-worker that everyone else always seems to avoid. He spent the next ten minutes telling me all about his abcessing sebaceous cysts. Apparently, "The scars look just like gunshot wounds." FML
Today, I noticed quite a few scars on one of my coworker's legs. I pulled her aside and told her that self-harm was never the answer, and if she needed to talk I was always there. Turns out she's just clumsy and trips a lot. FML
Today, I woke up to a bloody nose. Instead of rushing to the bathroom, I creatively dripped the blood over a knife for photography class because the assignment was to show emotion. So many of the students and faculty were disturbed that I'm now forced to talk to the school psychologist. FML
Top comments
Robbieisadowg 16
I was in this exact situation once (except it was my dog). I'm sure people will understand (eventually). At least people care about you!
juststephhere 23
Maybe it's the parrot who needs counselling...
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Comments (74)
Robbieisadowg 16
I was in this exact situation once (except it was my dog). I'm sure people will understand (eventually). At least people care about you!
KSer4lifeee 8
"Polly, No! I am not your cracker!
Crazc 15
but I'm your cracker
xxBFMVAAMIWxx 18
A friend of mine has a similar situation with her sadistic cat. They all joked around that she was cutting and should see a counselor. I stuck up for her each time, because they all have no idea what its actually like to cut...
HKCgrimmjow 15
But why does that pertain to her situation... She wasn't cutting to begin with
obi1kenobi 8
#1, your dog is so beautiful!
Robbieisadowg 16
#58 Thank you very much!
incoherentrmblr 22
Is your parrot the parrot from Aladdin?...
juststephhere 23
Maybe it's the parrot who needs counselling...
thejewishfuhrer 17
How do you intend to counsel a parrot?
badmandilon 19
Hahaha, you made me laugh!! That's true!
Welshite 40
#8: "I understand your frustration from your lack of crackers, Polly. Would you like to talk about it?"
184886837272837 32
Birds just do that. I'm pretty sure if my little parakeet was bigger she'd tear my mom's earrings right out of her lobes
OctoDope 15
My parrot does that exact thing, she will take earrings right from the lobe! We nicknamed her the klepto bird now. And they hardly feel a thing when it happens too, she also has a thing for ripping glasses from a face.
Comet_Candy 23
21 and 39 - You guys have cool birds ._. Mine just whistle pretty bird at me and preen me...
cmayer 20
That's actually kinda cute
xx000o 27
After the first time you get bit, you will never again think "that's kinda cute"
TiroC 25
Atleast they are concerned about you!
djinnsnme 19
Well at least you know they were concerned about you.
xxBFMVAAMIWxx 18
To all the people saying that the classmates are doing it because they cared... In my experience, and the experience of a few others close to me, 90% of the time referrals to a counselor are a way of degrading you, making you feel like a worthless piece of shit for not being able to deal with your problems properly. Each time I was referred was one of these instances, and it only made things worse until I found out that the last one was different, I was referred by a girl who cared. It helped a litte. But my point is don't assume that they care. Most times they don't give a **** and just want to laugh at the guy/girl covered in scars
Welshite 40
His bite is worse than your bark.
coried91 28
I have burn marks up and down my arms. I don't self harm, I'm just a clutz when it comes to the stove. I feel you pain OP. I got stuck in therapy for my "issues".
flufee2 27
Toucan play that game!!
Welshite 40
The parrot spray-painted his feathers black and used black nail polish on his claws. He's gone...emu.
skellingtonfart 18
Ah, #17, I got a laugh out of that!
JBirdeye 14
It seems he toucan use some counseling!
flufee2 27
He really ruffled tour feathers hahahah
flufee2 27
Your * :(
marcusadam21 2
Polly wanna cracker? Or in this case... Polly wanna arm?
askingandy 23
Damn. At least your classmates care, though! Half my class is suicidal and no one does a thing about it. Pretty sad because they all pretend they're so close.
Suaria 38
Ya that was like my class in middle school. Basically everyone was open about it but no one did anything. Of course this did bring problems for me because no one would believe me about how I felt since they thought I was just going with the tide.