Today, I was at the beach. I'd recently decided to try the "life hack" where you empty out a bottle of lotion and hide small valuables in it, to avoid them being stolen. I'd put the bottle in my bag. Instead of stealing stuff from inside it, though, someone just stole the whole bag. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML
Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML
Today, I fell asleep listening to my music and tanning at the beach. Not only did I wake up with a sunburn, but my iPhone had been stolen. FML
Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found the culprit, and to avoid a conflict, I just swiped it back when he wasn't looking. I felt pretty good about everything, until I got back home and realized it wasn't actually my towel after all. FML
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML
Today, I fell asleep with my luggage at a bus terminal. Upon waking up, I found that someone had opened my bags and stolen all my socks. FML
Today, after a long workout I come back to my locker, to find my lock had been cut. I looked inside realizing my phone and iPod had been stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, my keys were gone. I ran out to the parking lot to find an empty spot where my car had once been parked. FML
Today, after shopping alone at a grocery store, I was taking my groceries back to my car when a kid grabbed one of my bags and ran. Deciding not to risk leaving the rest of my groceries stranded, I didn't chase him. Later, I realized that was the bag my credit card was in. FML
Today, I went to the beach with a friend. We'd forgotten to get our towels out of the SUV, so I rushed back to the parking lot. I opened the passenger-side door and climbed in to begin my search. After ten seconds or so, I realized I'd busted into someone else's car. FML
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Top comments
Lilsbills 15
I thought Canadians were nice. FYL OP
Raykyogrou03 12
Never go swimming at the beach by yourself.
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Comments (86)
Raykyogrou03 12
Never go swimming at the beach by yourself.
Snowkeys 11
Its a possibility she was with her friends at the time in the water.
Caitie_kid 8
The best way to keep your actual valuables safe is to put them in a plastic baggy and bury it in the sand (a good ways down) next to your towel. Put a shell on it that won't attract a lot of attention, and done. Not many people think to dig in the sand when they're trying to steal like that.
MrSassypants 34
#28 "Mommy, mommy! While digging I found a plastic bag filled with a phone, money, and a ring in it!"
jjmiller1001 17
or don't take anything valuable
iBanana 17
How I hide my valuables: 1. Don't ever get a job. 2. Don't get money from a job so you don't have valuables. 3. Don't have valuables, so you never lose. No, but seriously- people will steal just about anything these days. Your best bet is to surgically implant a storage area in your stomach, and just swallow your stuff. When you're done- throw it back up. I should patent that...
xStaciexLynnx 15
28- I would feel like everyone was watching me and I would make myself a more obvious target. I'd be so shady and obvious about it looking around like nobody ever digs in the sand so clearly I'm hiding something.
SarMarJo 17
You guys are genius. I always hide it under the towel..
sarahmb98 8
#36, that wouldn't happen. Kids don't go digging around right next to other people's towels, they go by the water or by their own towels. Besides, the person could always bury the bag under they're towel and put a shell on it.
Lilsbills 15
I thought Canadians were nice. FYL OP
vipirius 18
Maybe it was a tourist?
uktwo 8
Or maybe Canadians aren't as stereotypically nice as people think.
TheDrifter 24
Nope, we like our stereotypes, OP must have been on vacation out of the country.
nurchok 15
Couldn't agree more with #42. I've been living in Canada since 2001 and can say with confidence, we - Canadians are very nice people :)... But seriously OP, why did you think someone at the beach would go through your bag and be noticed when they can just take the whole bag and go through it later? Best of luck though, hope you didn't have anything too valuable in it.
K410 18
Wait until you come to Toronto
happylappy 21
Or Vancouver.
beaunerific 10
Or Oshawa... I wouldn't suggest going to the beach there.
singer0421 32
So sorry OP :/ if you have a bag that zips try hiding it under the sand!
masika15 16
But what if someone steps on it??
Bano360 25
Well it would be under the sand, so you wouldn't need to worry about that.
MrSassypants 34
But you might need to worry about a kid digging it up.
potatomanjr 16
You can always dig a hole, then put your towl over where you just burried your items. But if you are going to a public place like that, leave your valuable items in the car, or just don't bring them.
sonicgreg 12
Sounds like you could use a lifeshark
russiancat464 12
could you just imagine the thief: "Ah time for some me time oh yeah" *opens lotion*....this will do
worldclassrager 41
You are better leaving your valuables in your car...that way they will never get stolen...
Carmstro 13
Unless someone breaks into your car...
corocoro 30
...or steals your car.
worldclassrager 41
Who would steal/break into a car at a busy beach? Someone would notice...
NoFlippinWai 24
people mind their own business. Have you ever seen someone breaking into their own car because they left their keys in it? have you helped them do it? what if it wasnt actually their car?
ksktwin84 14
"Life hack?"
TheBrochure 22
Type it in on Google or elsewhere. They show you (primarily) how to do cool things with ordinary objects to make your life easier!
PuggieKid 22
Thanks for the life hack tip though OP :D
TheBrochure 22
That's why you throw up in it-to protect it!
misspulkadot24 17
Or have a stranger do it for you. It's more likely to work if its not your own vomit.
dinagdotphoto 13
So that's what that guy in yesterday's fml was doing! And here we all thought he was trying to steal her purse, when he was a gentleman preventing it from being stolen instead! ...The more you know..
misspulkadot24 17
No way Hosea! That guy was actually the nicest man in town.
happylappy 21
It's Jose. Just saying..
TheBrochure 22
#65 - I believe that #49 was making a sort of play on the phrase (like "Oh, my God!" = "Oh, my gatos!"), replacing the original with Hosea, a Hebrew prophet, to the best of my (open-to-correction) knowledge. Also, if you are dedicated to being correct, then it is "José."
misspulkadot24 17
In my house we say Hosea. It's just a play on the original. Sorry to José if it offended him.
HeartOfLead 24
You should try the life hack where you leave valuables at home... Decreases the chances of getting robbed by 100%.
VeganVampyre 27
That is completely untrue. People's houses get robbed all the time. I personally lost about a thousand dollars worth of stuff a few years ago when someone broke into my house.
aliiballybee 9
Why were you stupid enough to leave your bag unattended then? YDI
MissCharlotte_fml 26
I know right! The whole point of the hack is to just have the bottle out, then people think it is just sunscreen. Putting it in your bag is probably the stupidest thing to do, it defeats the whole idea
Phoebe_Buffay 14
Well, c'mon OP, when someone steals something, they're probably in a rush to get away from the scene. They're not going to rummage through a bag, they're gonna take the whole thing and rummage later. Sorry, but I'm gonna have to say YDI.