Today, I waited for 20 minutes to get a cab outside grand central station in New York (it was raining). Finally, to my relief, I found a cab but when I got in I let a little fart slip. Two minutes later the cabby kicked me out of his cab because I stunk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got kicked out of an Uber for "smelling bad." FML
Today, I had a wet fart with liquid in my underwear that I could smell. I let the one guy in front of me take the elevator so he wouldn't smell me. When the next empty elevator showed up, seven people started lining up behind me. FML
Today, my boss offered to give me a ride on her way home. Two seconds before getting into the car, I had to let out a fart. I didn't think the fart would follow me in, but it did. She rolled down the windows, and we lapsed into a silent, awkward ride home. FML
Today, I rode in the cab on the way back to my dorm from the airport. The taxi driver was on the phone and not really paying attention. I paid him and got out of the cab, but he drove away before I could get my luggage out of the trunk. FML
Today, I took a cab ride home from a bar. After a few minutes of horrible driving, I felt sick. The cab driver got so mad she locked me in the car and started driving me to the cops unless I payed her extra. Basically, I paid $120 for a five-minute cab ride. FML
Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML
Today, I halted a cab. It was 12 degrees and snowing outside. When I went to get in, a man shoved me away and I slipped on ice into dirty snow slush, and he stole my cab. As it drove off, the man flipped me off. FML
Today, I was running late for school because I had a huge stomach ache. To save on time, I took a taxi. When the taxi driver hit a bump, I lost control of my bowels and shit myself. Not only do I have to wash my underwear in the sink at school now, but I had to pay the driver extra to remove the smell from his car. FML
Today, my girlfriend let out a vile fart in an Uber. It stank so bad, the driver threatened to kick us out. She blamed it on me and called me a pig. Then, she ripped another one, and he actually did kick us out. She had the nerve to act hurt when I called a second Uber only for myself. FML
Today, I was stuck in a stiflingly hot port-a-potty for 30 minutes with the worst bowel issues ever due to food poisoning. To make things worse, the maintenance guy came two minutes in to drain the thing and had to wait outside till I was done, muttering angrily at me as I took the humiliating walk of shame to my car. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
badbunny 0
wow, when you stink worse than the cab....bad...
604 11
Did you still have to pay? We're all wondering.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (51)
604 11
Did you still have to pay? We're all wondering.
amatayo 0
I think u got what u deserve
VirtuallyUnbreak 0
whatever...how did the cabbie smell that over his own stench. also those greedy bastards wouldn't care if you shitted in their vehicle as long as they received their money.
yesfylhaha 0
GO HYPER BEAM HIS FACE AND HIS EFFING CAB
erwaggoner 0
Because I am a ass...it is Grand Central Terminal you dolt. Bad enough when the twats around here don't know that but someone who has been there should know better.
mps1969 8
Who really cares but you certainly we don't .
thew_fml 14
actually no one here in NYC calls it grand central terminal. we all call it grand central station. im pretty sure this is fake though - people fart in cabs every day
reecescuphoe 0
well that is new york for ya =)
dredd_fml 1
I'm actually not sure he's ALLOWED to kick you out "because you stink". Did you get his medallion number? You should call the TLC and say something.
jarly 0
Ok, this does not happen. I live in NY and cabbies do not kick you out, even if the fart is really bad.
22cute 17
So you know this because you've done studies? What was your "control group", silent-but-deadlies? And what was the size of each cohort?
jarly 0
And reecescuphoe, that is so not New York.
reecescuphoe 0
actually it is.. anything can happen..born and raised in NY i should know
jarly 0
And reecescuphoe, that is so not New York.