Today, I used a public restroom. I saw my sister's shoes walk into the stall next to me, so I gave her a little nudge with my foot. We then nudged each other until I walked out and saw a homeless man with the same shoes as my sister. He then tried to hold my hand. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a public restroom when someone took the toilet next to mine. Moments later, a used tampon rolls into my cubicle followed by an "Oops!" A creeping hand then promptly reached under to retrieve it. Both her hand and the tampon touched my bare toes. FML
Today, I walked into a public toilet and I opened a stall door, only to discover someone who had forgotten to lock the door sitting on the can. Instead of saying "Sorry," I panicked and said, "Nice shoes!" I then had to wait until they left because I was too embarrassed to face them. FML
Today, I took my brother to the bathroom at a restaurant. The stall next to mine was locked, so I assumed he was still in there. I yelled his name a few times, then banged on the door out of annoyance. I gave up and returned to the table, where he was sitting with a grin. Turns out I just traumatized a poor lady in the stall. FML
Today, while shopping for a pair of shoes, I saw a pair I really liked lying around, so I sat down to try them on. Then, a man came up to me and pointed out that they were actually his shoes. FML
Today, I was using a public toilet stall when the lock gave way, and the door swung open halfway. I froze, and the person who was washing his hands at the sinks looked at me in the mirror and awkwardly said, “I see you.” I muttered, “I’m sorry,” as he walked out looking like he'd seen a ghost. FML
Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML
Today, I was walking out of a Starbucks and saw someone walking out behind me. Thinking it would be the nice thing to do, I held the door open. I was holding the door for about 30 seconds before realizing I was holding the door for my own shadow. FML
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Today, I attempted to be nice and hold a door open for a person in a wheelchair. He hit the button to open another door. While I pointed out that I would hold the door for him, I realized that the door I was holding open for him led down some stairs. FML
Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML
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Top comments
BlueMoonCafe 12
Bathroom foot nudging is always the best way to make new friends.
Ray9889 8
That's pretty much all your fault... Shouldn't be playing footsies with someone while in the bathroom
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Comments (116)
BlueMoonCafe 12
Bathroom foot nudging is always the best way to make new friends.
thatkidhesh 11
OP you're actually weirder than the man wearing womens shoes
kingsley_fml 8
Larry Craig?
SwaggCapone 11
Did y'all play Battleshits too?
fluffypigeon 8
Personally, I would like to know why he was in the ladies, not the mens...
feelingold 18
be grateful there wasn't a glory hole in there
imaginaryvoice 18
Am I the only one that finds it weird that you were trying to play footsies with your sister while your pants were down?
mr_sarcastic416 29
cross dresser/tranny.... thinks he's a woman stuck in a mans body, so he chooses to use the women's room because he thinks it's where he should be going
MeLoveCats 7
hahaha i just can't stop laughing at this FML! it's so weird that the man was wearing the same shoes as the sister and goes into the girls restroom too!
fymother 13
89, neither of those terms are correct or polite (welcome to the 21st century, buddy). A transsexual woman would use the women's restroom. A cross dresser does it for a fetish and doesn't identify as female. A tranny is your limited language skills trying to understand something you've never had to experience. A homeless guy used the wrong bathroom. He could be illiterate. He could just not care.
MyNameIsViet 15
89, or he could be a peeping Tom.
Ray9889 8
That's pretty much all your fault... Shouldn't be playing footsies with someone while in the bathroom
ygdrassil 17
Especially if your only identification is by their shoes: multiple people often own the same shoes. And if it was a man, couldn't his hairy legs have tipped you off?
perdix 31
#2, a'ight, a'ight. Maybe I ought to quit. So, genius, what would you have me do in there to kill time when taking a mega-dump? I'm all ears, Einstein!
Ameel_fml 19
Even if it was OP's sister, wouldn't that be a little weird? If I was trying to do a pee or poop, I wouldn't want my sister to start playing footsies with me from the next stall. :/
RedWingSD 6
Lol ydi why on earth would you play footsies with ANYONE in bathroom!!!!!!!!
MDTeddy 13
Anything in a bathroom would probably be weird. What I just want to know is why we don't press ydi when it is in fact ydi. It is completely obvious. Who the hell didn't press it? Tell me you dumb ******* bitches. If you aren't intelligent then get off the internet.
nightbirdblue 27
#61, Well, there are the people that vote YDI all the time that end up voting FML when fmls like this come around.
Ray9889 8
Well #18, perhaps you should concentrate more on what's going on inside your stall, instead of checking out the other persons shoes? You could always whip out your phone, mister, and go on FML to make "mega-dumps" more enjoyable.
mr_sarcastic416 29
#18 I don't know about you or anyone else....but I'm on the FML app while I'm on the can until I finish up
WhackTheJackal 22
You realize he was in the ******* women's bathroom?
Prolux_fml 23
Did he at least wash his hands before he tried to hold yours?
fakedsincerity 32
Lol ew. You didn't notice his feet were bigger? Unless your sister has massive feet/ he had tiny ones. Or his shoes were dirty.
Jayalferez 15
your sisters shoes are not the only pair out there
nightbirdblue 27
Unless they're homemade shoes with cloud, moon, and rainbows stickers, silver glitter, a dead spider, and bacon strips on them.
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Well of course, 67, duh!! xD
FRB 8
Oh my god ...that's creepy
Pleonasm 36
Lady and the Tramp meets 2 Stalls 1 Footsie.
killer6969 16
Well looks like someone found their soulmate just hope he doesn't stay outside your apartment for four hours
lengi123 18
or solemate, which would be more appropriate in this situation.
perdix 31
Your sister wears hobo shoes? She's going to need to dress it up a little. Or did the bum kill your sister and steal her shoes, just so he could get close to you in the toilet? That would be so romantic, uber-creepy, but romantic, nevertheless!
brittyboo123 35
You started it!