Today, I used a public restroom. I saw my sister's shoes walk into the stall next to me, so I gave her a little nudge with my foot. We then nudged each other until I walked out and saw a homeless man with the same shoes as my sister. He then tried to hold my hand. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a public restroom when someone took the toilet next to mine. Moments later, a used tampon rolls into my cubicle followed by an "Oops!" A creeping hand then promptly reached under to retrieve it. Both her hand and the tampon touched my bare toes. FML
Today, I walked into a public toilet and I opened a stall door, only to discover someone who had forgotten to lock the door sitting on the can. Instead of saying "Sorry," I panicked and said, "Nice shoes!" I then had to wait until they left because I was too embarrassed to face them. FML
Today, I took my brother to the bathroom at a restaurant. The stall next to mine was locked, so I assumed he was still in there. I yelled his name a few times, then banged on the door out of annoyance. I gave up and returned to the table, where he was sitting with a grin. Turns out I just traumatized a poor lady in the stall. FML
Today, while shopping for a pair of shoes, I saw a pair I really liked lying around, so I sat down to try them on. Then, a man came up to me and pointed out that they were actually his shoes. FML
Today, I was using a public toilet stall when the lock gave way, and the door swung open halfway. I froze, and the person who was washing his hands at the sinks looked at me in the mirror and awkwardly said, “I see you.” I muttered, “I’m sorry,” as he walked out looking like he'd seen a ghost. FML
Today, while using a public restroom to change my tampon, I made eye contact with someone looking at me through the little space in the door. FML
Today, I was walking out of a Starbucks and saw someone walking out behind me. Thinking it would be the nice thing to do, I held the door open. I was holding the door for about 30 seconds before realizing I was holding the door for my own shadow. FML
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Today, I attempted to be nice and hold a door open for a person in a wheelchair. He hit the button to open another door. While I pointed out that I would hold the door for him, I realized that the door I was holding open for him led down some stairs. FML
Today, my sister asked me to grab her some toilet paper. I refused, so she grabbed my favorite shirt out of the laundry basket and used it to wipe. I was busy icing my sprained ankle. I couldn't walk. She knew this. FML
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Top comments
BlueMoonCafe 12
Bathroom foot nudging is always the best way to make new friends.
Ray9889 8
That's pretty much all your fault... Shouldn't be playing footsies with someone while in the bathroom
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Comments (116)
cottoncandymango 17
He wants you.
LaLa_xo 14
What I don't understand is why there was a man in the girl's washroom.
cblock94 7
Thank you! I was beginning to think if I was the only one who thought that
Schiffy 18
"I thought you were my sister" is probably not the best thing to say there.
jerry2011 4
Probably best day ever, for the homeless guy
thebear683 6
shocker for you, your sister doesn't have completely unique shoes. you probably shouldn't go around judging people in bathroom stalls based on their footwear. that's like me grabbing a woman's ass because she has the same jeans as my girlfriend.
Omegamike101 7
Omg I need to try this now XD
thebear683 6
good luck 53
Enslaved 38
Sounds like he wanted you to quit stalling and just hold his hand already.
Whatapuffchild 23
ah footsies is always fun! exspecially with old, scary, homlessmen
mybarra6 17
It's look like assuming this time only made an ass out of...well...you. YDI
Acrlyx 8
Aren't the homeless great? :)
SweetasCandy0609 28
why didn't you just ask if it was your sister instead of old playing footsie's with them, if I'm in the bathroom and if I think i know the person in the stall next to me i just say hey so and so is that you because I know that more than person can own the same kind of shoes.