Today, I turned 18. My parents remembered that I loved German chocolate cake, so I awoke to a hot, fudge-filled chocolate cake with a slice cut out just for me. I've been lactose-intolerant for 8 years. As I cried, my mom handed me tissues, while eating the "Happy" part of my cake. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my parents brought me an ice cream birthday cake. I would think after 23 years they would remember my lactose intolerance. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My only birthday present was a cake that my dad bought from Walmart. Well, it sure looked tasty. The only problem: it had nuts on it. Guess what I'm highly allergic too? At least my dad told me he'd "tell me how it tastes." FML
Today, my mother turned up drunk at my house with a chocolate cake for my 14th birthday. I'm 27, I haven’t seen her in 6 years, I'm allergic to chocolate, and when she saw that I had 2 kids, she wanted to know why I'd bothered, since kids are always "such a disappointment". FML
Today, my mom told me she is serving lasagna and Italian cream cake at my bridal shower. I'm severely lactose intolerant, which I have been telling her for years. She responded by telling me, and I quote, "The food is for the guests." FML
Today, my mother in-law made dessert. It was a beautiful chocolate cake, chocolate cookies, and every other thing had chocolate in it. I'm deathly allergic to chocolate and she knows this. FML
Today, it was my 17th birthday. I didn't want my family to spend money on a cake, so my dad made this delicious apple ring. At least, it was great until my mouth began to itch and my throat closed. I have been allergic to nuts since birth, and my dad put walnuts in my birthday cake. FML
Today, it's my 18th birthday. Last month was my best friend's 18th birthday. She spent the night with me, and the next morning, my mom and brother gathered in my room and sang "Happy Birthday" as they handed her pancakes with a candle on top. Today, I was woken up by screams to take the trash out. FML
Today, I turned eighteen. Thinking I was going to get a big present from my parents on this special day, I eagerly unwrapped my present. They got me a bag of M and M's. Last year I got flannel bed sheets. FML
Today, I woke up early and spent hours baking and icing a three-tier cake for my friend's eighteenth birthday, which is this evening. I just found out my mother threw it in the compost bin because she's on a diet and it was "tempting" her. FML
Today, my family surprised me for my birthday by showing up with a chocolate cake and my ex-boyfriend from back home. They all forgot I'm allergic to chocolate, that I broke up with him about a year ago, and that he’s been trying to win me back ever since. FML
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Top comments
chippa 24
OP discovered a cake that they fell madly in love with 8 or more years ago. 8 years ago, they could no longer have this cake or anything else containing dairy products. Today is their 18th birthday. Their family made OP the previously mentioned cake that OP has not been able to eat for 8 years and still cannot eat. OP cried because they can't eat this delicious birthday cake and evidently, their family doesn't know her very well. OP's mom ate a piece of the cake which had a smiley face or something on it. Do you get it now? It's not that hard to understand...
chippa 24
Dude, who cares about the aftermath, eat it anyway.
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Comments (206)
chevyguy85 0
you wont die if you have dairy and your lactose intolerant....they make pills that temporarily allow you to eat dairy
sallen0046 4
You're 18, stop complaining. Only five year olds cry when they can't eat something they want, you have some serious growing up to do. You don't even have the common sense to keep lactose tablets on hand in case you want to consume some, how can you really expect anyone to have any pity for you? Get off your ass, go to the store, buy some lactose tablets, and eat the damned cake. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
0neiros 14
**** "The Minority" I'm Not Saying **** "Minorities" Such as Black People, I'm saying **** "The Minority" That Ruins it for the Rest of us. I remember when one of the major Airlines announced they will no longer Serve Peanuts...Why??? Because of "The Minority" that are allergic to them. WELL **** YOU!!! It says PEANUTS on the ******* Package, so Ask for Something else you Moron, no I don't want ******* Pretzels, I want a ******* bag of ******* Peanuts. Firecrackers, Bottle Rockets, Sparklers etc. Are Banned in a Lot of Places, Why??? Because of "The Minority" that are Too ******* Stupid to know better and Blow their fingers off, or Light themselves on Fire. Thanks, My 4th of July is Boring because Some Asshat now Has the Nickname 3 Finger Jack because he was too stupid to know not to hold onto an M-80. And the best example of course is Rabbi Imgonnasue in Seattle who caused Seatac Airport to pull their Christmas Trees, because since he wasn't going to get his way about putting up a Menorah, he pulls his lawyer out of his back Pocket. He said he was appalled by their decision. HEY ASSHOLE, YOU THREATENED TO SUE, you didn't want to compromise, or just for ******* once in your life take NO as an answer. Their POV-a Chrismas tree is a decoration, NOT a Statement of faith, a Menorah is a statement of faith, put it up, they'd have to put up one for everybody else. Well he finally relented when he was labeled as the asshole he is, finally the majority stood up and made itself heard. Yes "The Minority" is out there to Ruin a good time for all, because how dare we have fun and they can't. **** YOU MINORITY.
KylaaKatastrophe 0
Raaaandom capitalization, FTW. LOL, JK it makes it look like you're raising your voice for no apperent reason. *Facepalm*
5t3ff1k4h 47
Haha, I take it you read it stressing (or... screaming I guess would be more accurate) the words 301 capitalized too? I always find that hilarious.
frankenhole 0
i don't get why you cried. it's cake. you turned 18.
RinoaHeartilly 36
That would be frustrating and a bit sad but it's not worth crying over. Man up for god's sake.
FlonkertonChamp 6
you cried because you couldn't eat a cake? you're 18. get the **** over it.
emerybear 0
ya, don't cry.
snizzlesnuzzle 0
I would eat it anyway.
jdgcali 0
roccorox is hot!!!
xxElle 0
y were yu crying?