Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came out to my parents and siblings as gay. They were very accepting and asked me why I waited until I was 25 to do so. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was their own homophobic remarks that kept me closeted since I realized it at 14, and that a previous coming-out to a parent was dismissed as 'a phase'. FML
Today, I came out to my parents. Their response was basically, "Oh, you’re coming out? But we’ve known for years. It was obvious, so obvious we never knew you were in the closet in the first place." FML
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I'm gay. My mom said "Yeah, we know." When I asked how they knew, my dad, without looking up from the tv, said, "We've been monitoring your Internet history." FML
Today, I came out to my parents as lesbian. Surprisingly, they were OK with it… just as long as I still marry a dude, give them grandbabies, and keep the whole lesbian thing a deep, dark, shameful secret that we never talk about again. FML
Today, I came out to my therapist as gay. Claiming that my parents "can't be that homophobic", my therapist outed me to them. They kicked me out of the house. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, after being out of the closet for over three years, I learned that some of my friends still don't believe me that I am really a lesbian. They still think I made the whole thing up because I can't get a man. FML
Today, I came out to my mom. I had an epic speech planned, and when I tried to tell her, it all fell apart and I started crying and just said, "I'm gay." After a few seconds silence, my mom sighs and says, "Duh." FML
Today, I came out of the closet. I came out on Facebook to spare myself awkward conversations and gossip. I wrote a deeply meaningful status about my partner and my pride in who I was. The only responses were, "Lol", "Hacked", and similar remarks. FML
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Top comments
Ilovelife07 0
YDI for somehow thinking telling your friends about your parents being divorced is "coming clean"
boone_fml 0
FYL cause your friend thought you were gay? big deal.
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Comments (43)
JADEstokesxo 0
http://ihatejade.com/?id=2069pce3fitbpw8l5s3rcw9shrmr5j
guitardedman 0
Anyone seen Out Cold? the movie this was stolen from? "guys, i've got something to say" -"Yeah lance, youre gay, its ok" "what??" -"come on man everybody knows nobody cares" "well i was going to say that i was adopted..." its a pretty good movie. also, YDI if this is even real because no guy should preface anything serious like that. just ******* say it and get over it, don't make an event out of it and try to get pity from everyone. saying you're coming clean sounds like you're owning up to something embarassing or difficult, saying your parents are spitting up is both common and uncontrollable.
ultraslick 0
YDI, only people who come out talk about "something I've been hiding"
greenfairy_fml 0
Aw, sorry about your parents. And whatever, your friend thought you were gay and you weren't. That shouldn't be an insult.
CCFML 0
He could have just been busting your balls. If some of my friends came up to me all serious saying they had something to get off their chest, that could very well be my response even though i know they're not gay. If that was the case, YDI for being over sensitive.
dramatic11 0
YDI for wording it wrong. It seems fake. How do you "come clean" by announcing your parents divorce? It's really none of their business anyway!
VereorTenebrae 0
Ouch, that sucks, but you definitely could've worded it better >.>
FarSide 23
Ouch. Sorry about that divorce. But, at least you're gay.
Gitsandshiggles 0
YDI. If you don't want your friends thinkin you're gay, don't act so gay. at least they're cool with the idea of it. you have good friends. Also, don't be such a piss about a divorce. it's the way of the world.
perdix 31
I don't know why you had to hide your parents' divorce. Did you cause it? Y'know, the word MILF doesn't apply to your OWN mother, dipshit.