Today, I told my boyfriend that I've been diagnosed with gestational diabetes. Despite all my attempts to explain that he's wrong, he is totally convinced that my genitals have diabetes. This guy is going to be such a great father to our kids. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my boyfriend I had diabetes. He won't talk to me anymore because he thinks I'll infect him with it. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me after I told her I found out I have diabetes. She thought it was an STD and I had cheated on her. So I explained what it really was and she dumped me again because she didn't want her future children to inherit my fucked up DNA. FML
Today, my dad went to the doctor to find out if he is autistic. When we walked in, the doctor asked why he wasn't testing if he was diabetic, effectively calling my dad fat. My dad was deeply offended, so I gave that jackass doctor an earful. But as it turns out, he was correct. My dad does have diabetes. FML
Today, since I needed someone to talk to about it, I told my girlfriend how my dad was recently diagnosed with diabetes. My girlfriend's mother then told me, in graphic detail, how her father's diabetes led to his toes being hacked off. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He seemed excited, and said we should make the baby fat so he can bounce her on his lap and watch her double chin jiggle. Just to prove he's serious, he's been searching for high-calorie foods for babies. FML
Today, I announced to my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He immediately denied that it was his because "a childhood accident" supposedly left him sterile. He has a child from a previous relationship. FML
Today, my family decided it'd be a great idea to berate me for not being excited enough for my brother and his wife's baby news. They told us on my birthday, adding that if I wasn't so fat I'd have one too. I have insulin-resistant PCOS. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I was afraid our future children would be fat and ugly. He reassured me, saying that he was sure our spawn would take on after him. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with diabetes. I went to tell my grandpa, who immediately said, "I'm sorry, let's go get ice cream to cheer you up." FML
Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML
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Top comments
rttr 18
That's the same reaction my dad had when they found out my mom had it! Don't worry, just teach him what it really is. Also I'm sorry, but that is very funny.
doctorhook86 25
33: I have type 2 genital diabetes; my penis gets fat whenever a pretty girl gives it some sugar.
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Comments (123)
banan001 6
What an idiot, can't believe this champ is gona be a father, poor kid!
hateevryone 15
You shouldn't even think about having babies with this moron.
kikikimsicles 0
Wow I have gestational diabetes too I should join the club maybe your boyfriend will be afraid of me too. Ass.
Thorzix 23
Don't let him procreate, dump his dumb ass
dlcj22 11
Should have chosen better lol
urbanimpression 6
Its called google. Has he heard of it?
Jasonf6 0
Ummm, dump the idiot BEFORE you have kids imo.
sulitak 27
The kid is already on the way... meaning they're already linked... Gestational Diabetes is a pregnancy thing
HeartOfLead 24
Hopefully they don't either inherit catch your otherwise gestational diabetes. Tell your boyfriend to get checked to make sure he doesn't have it.
courtneybro 0
LOL WHAT.
KillerCheez 2
Why do girls love dating idiots? Just another thing us guys will never understand.