Today, I started a new job at a glass shop and my boss asked me to vacuum. I ended up tipping over and shattering the most expensive bong in the shop, which retailed at $3,000. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, for the first time in months, a potential employer was willing to give me a job. On my way out of the interview, I tripped over and broke a 1000 dollar glass table. FML
Today, I dropped some glass at my job while putting it on the shelf. A shard bounced off the floor and went up my nose. FML
Today, at my first day of my dream job, I dropped a delicate $700 piece of machinery on the ground. FML
Today, it was my first day at work as a waitress. The day ended with me owing my employers money, after I accidentally smashed an expensive bottle of wine on the floor. FML
Today, I was at work, nonchalantly spinning my keys around my finger when they flew off and hit a glass cabinet. Broken glass showered passing customers. I don't think I'll have a job to go to tomorrow. FML
Today, it was my first day at a new job as a waitress for a wedding function centre. As I was opening the door to collect dirty plates from the guests, I bumped into a colleague carrying a tray full of full champagne glasses, all of which fell and smashed on the floor. FML
Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML
Today, at my new job waitressing, I walked into a glass door at full speed while carrying a tray of drinks. Not only did I spill everything, but I also left a weird make up face print on the glass for everyone to laugh at. FML
Today, I knocked over and broke one of two very expensive wine bottles. As I was using the mop to clean it up, the handle knocked over and broke the other. FML
Today, I accidentally broke a vase. When I was clearing it up, I used my bare hand to sweep up the shards without thinking. I'm still fishing pieces of broken glass out of my hand. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Usually, the interview process weeds out dopes like you. I’ll be blunt, your career has gone to pot and it’s doobie-ous that you’ll succ-seed.
joeyl1990 28
Why would anyone need a $3000 bong? Just inject the weed like a normal person.
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Comments (10)
jbuckets_404 39
Obviously, OP's boss didn't take into account any of the various ways that a delicate, brittle sales item could be broken (by employee or customer) when putting said item on display. So don't pay for it OP, that's the purpose for having business insurance. Good luck!
Christopher Martin 12
Emphasis on the name “GLASS” shop.
RichardPencil 32
Usually, the interview process weeds out dopes like you. I’ll be blunt, your career has gone to pot and it’s doobie-ous that you’ll succ-seed.
manb91uk 22
Didn’t you think it might be good to leaf out a few puns, bud?
RichardPencil 32
I try to keep my quality high, or I might get stoned by the dealers of hate.
Demon_of_Light 27
That's one way to get out of vacuuming.
joeyl1990 28
Why would anyone need a $3000 bong? Just inject the weed like a normal person.
Mungolikecandy 19
Or insert it into their ******.
Glowworm56 27
Did your new job go up in smoke afterwards?
Neror 13
At least you were already prepared to clean it up.