Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was craving a cold Coke, so I grabbed one from the freezer where I had put it to chill quickly. As soon as I opened it, the can exploded all over me and the kitchen. I spent the next hour cleaning sticky residue off the floor, surrounding furniture, and even the ceiling. FML
Today, I spent almost an hour cleaning and scrubbing the inside of my fridge. Just when I'd finished putting everything back inside, I tipped over the open milk carton. FML
Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML
Today, I mopped all the floors in my house. When I was finally done, I accidentally knocked over an open bottle of soda. My cats took this as a perfect opportunity to chase each other around, step in the soda, and track sticky paw prints everywhere. FML
Today, I caught a falling jar in the kitchen with one hand and I felt like an action hero. In celebrating, I yelled, “Did you see that?!” The jar then slipped out of my hand, smashed onto the floor, and splattered sauce all over me. My roommate flipped me the finger and left me to clean up. FML
Today, just before bed, I decided to put away the dry washing. I ended up knocking over my boyfriend's precious brewing ginger beer. It took me an hour to clean it off the floor, cupboards, door, outside and inside of the fridge. Everything is still sticky and smells of yeast. FML
Today, I remembered my mom got her carpet cleaned and to be careful while she was at work. To be nice, I vacuumed the whole house. Feeling proud of myself, I got a drink and went upstairs. I tripped and spilled red Kool-Aid all over the floor. FML
Today, I cleaned up the entire kitchen after sending the kids to school. I decided to have a nice cup of tea, and then knocked the tea over into the bin and the bin cabinet, the hardest and grossest thing to clean. FML
Today, while working in my shop, I was mopping the floor. A customer saw what I was doing, grabbed a bottle of Coca-Cola from the shelf, and poured it all over the floor where I had just finished mopping. FML
Today, I woke up earlier to food prep for lunch later. Just as I was preparing the ingredients, I dropped a thick glass saucer on the kitchen counter and it shattered like a hail storm - everywhere in the kitchen. I ended up spending more time cleaning it out and obviously logged in to work later than usual. FML
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Top comments
GoPlayInTraffic 2
At least its roomates. I just got home from a busy day and I want to cook supper but until I could start I had to move dumped purse contents from the stove top, papers, tissues, makeup, crap, along with dirty dishes from the work area next to the stove. And for my own sanity I brought dirty dishes from the living room, as well as threw away several used facial tissues that were laying around. I cleaned Friday. It's only Sunday and I was barely home yesterday. I have a messy wife. FML4life
vexxcis 0
Screw your roommates! Tell them to clean it up!
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Comments (158)
penicillin 0
Soda can be tricky since it makes everything so sticky. Anyway, I had lazy roommates too. Two were pilling lots of dishes and hiding the unclean dishes everywhere because they believe the new roommate was putting his utensils with theirs so it was smelly. I was cleaning everything I was cleaning the bathroom while they were playing video games and talking about Pokémon and guys who wear too tight jeans (the roommates who did it were a girl and a boy in fact.). I decided to not do anything 2 weeks before I left after asking them many times to clean sometimes. Then, they were bitching everyone about how much nobody did anything and they told me they were trying to make the new guy clean up. Honestly. Some people are full of shit and like to stay in their own mess. Change place.
scruff13 0
awwe, sorry ):
Blacklynx 0
or better, pour the soda ALL over their pillow so when they go to bed their hair gets all sticky!
Hazelfbabyyy 0
That reallly sucks, but YDi for not opening it over the sink. oooh I'm 69 ;)
zuratai 0
This is homosex very homosex. You must find better friends!
justj2010 0
homosex? if you're gonna use a gay epithet, at least get the stereotype right. homosex would be ikea, not pigsty. lol
zuratai 0
I say wat I say when I want to say
itz_towelie 6
your comments sound like they were written by rainman... but you're a straightshooter, ill give you that sir
kybabyy 4
Hahaha. Homosex =D
zuratai 0
you have nice smile I like. yes ver nice <3+1
mayaaaxoxo 0
awww, fyl
xgoldfishx 0
ha bad luck op
ManOnTheEdge 0
37, it's impossible to spend hours cleaning the kitchen unless it hasn't been cleaned in about a year. slob op is a slob
ImaginaryFoe 1
That's ridiculously untrue. I'm guessing your kitchen isn't all that clean. It took me over an hour the other day just to scrub the floor. Add another hour for scrubbing the cabinets, washing the refrigerator, and cleaning the oven. And that doesn't even include the time it takes to wash the dishes.
iondadola 0
ydi for slamming around stuff while cleaning. you had a bad attitude and shook up that soda! clean up that mess and make me a sammich!
whitehawk_fml 0
throw a rag on it just soda