Today, I shaved my face after several months of growth. This would be OK if my 4-year-old daughter would still talk to me. Apparently she doesn't recognise me, and I'm scary. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it's been a while since I tried the "shave-your-beard to see if your baby recognises you afterwards" trick. I wasn’t expecting her to start crying, real heartbreaking tears. The beard's now grown back but she still cries and screams whenever she sees me, and we don’t know what to do. I think traumatised my daughter. FML
Today, I arrived home, having just had my long hair cut and my beard shaved. My idiot daughter’s reaction when she saw me? “Who are you and how did you get in the house?” FML
Today, my 5-year-old daughter sobbed inconsolably on my return home from a several-month long deployment to the Middle East. I was touched by her reaction until she blurted out that she wasn't crying because she missed me, but because my shaved head looked scary ugly. FML
Today, I had to meet my mother. Being a college student, I decided I was too lazy to shave this morning. She noticed the stubble on my face, and started crying because I'm growing up. I'm 23 years-old. My dad yelled at me for making my mom cry. FML
Today, I asked my dad to please shave his awful beard, because I'm a laughing-stock at school for being picked up each day by a guy whose face looks like Bigfoot's ass. He agreed, and 10 minutes later was sporting a pedo-stache. It's going to be a long year. FML
Today, I got my long hair cut in a short pixie cut. When my five year old daughter saw me she laughed and proclaimed 'You look just like a man!'. That afternoon I got a concerned call from the school. My daughter has told everyone 'mummy has gone away, I now have two daddies!' FML
Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML
Today, I went to pick up my daughter from my dad's house. He'd shaved her head bald. "For a laugh." FML
Today, my 4-year-old son cut half of my hair when I was asleep because he thought I would look better that way. FML
Today, a 4 year-old saw me and started crying and screaming like heck. I mean, I knew that I didn't look good, but this is too much. FML
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Top comments
IvyOswin 17
At least now you know that she won't talk to strangers!
epicRawrz 16
That's why you got to do the whole 'shave with daddy' thing and let her watch you.
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Comments (83)
swankmrpancake 8
A beard is a sign of manliness your daughter just doesn't like you being less of a man
Bloink 25
Hmm usually a beard means scary, not shaven face...
QueenSaru 28
It's probably because like with glasses/without, people can look REALLY different with facial hair/without, or sometimes even with just a haircut/style change, and to kids especially that change is magnified.
doglover100 29
My dad had to shave his beard because my sister was afraid of him.
catchmenow1 21
Oh yeah. That will make it better.
babygirl4855 11
My dad did the same thing when I was younger.
jerryj 27
No he didn't.
SexyGamerNerd110 8
At least you will be able to sleep at night knowing that while your daughter may not be talking to you.. She won't be taking candy from a stranger in a shady van any time soon :D
Squirrel1256 15
Dad of the year!
worldclassrager 41
She'll get used to it eventually...don't worry about it..,
XxNightwingxX 21
The reason that this is hilarious is because I was around that age when I convinced my dad to shave his mustache. When I saw him without it, I cried.
AnOriginalName 19
I've got a better idea! Pop out from under her bed and scare the shit out of her. .... That's a better idea, right?
wafflefriez91 17
I cried when i was little because i didn't know who my dad was after he shaved his mustache off lol.