Today, I painfully watched my doctor burn a hole in my nail to drain the blood underneath. This is the prescribed treatment for the injury of hammering your thumb. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had surgery done to fix an ingrown toenail. When the doctor started cutting the nail, my toe wasn't entirely numb. FML
Today, I now know how it feels to have a splinter of wood hammered a full inch underneath your fingernail. FML
Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML
Today, I was clipping my nails. When I got to my toenail, the whole thing somehow ripped right out. I'm in agony. FML
Today, I sliced a deep gash into my thumb while carving up bagels. After putting a plaster on, I returned to my room to relax, where I lit a candle. The flame from my new lighter shot up, and set fire to the plaster on my thumb. Now I have a cut AND several burns. FML
Today, I went to the hospital to get my ingrown toenail removed. The doctors put me on a little surgery table and told me to relax. They then injected anesthetic into my toe four times and used a pair of scissors to slowly cut through my nail. Only, the anesthetic hadn't started to work just yet. FML
Today, my husband stabbed me with his unusually long, nasty toenails in the leg while he slept. It took 3 stitches to fix it up, my husband and doctor laughed the entire time. He still refuses to cut them. FML
Today, I learned what a nail gun shooting my leg feels like. FML
Today, I noticed one of my toenails was getting super long, so I cut it. In doing so, I accidentally ripped it off and it started bleeding. As I went to get something to stop it from bleeding, I got a huge splinter in my little toe, causing a painful infection. I think I should just go back to bed. FML
Today, years after I stepped on a nail and had the wound stitched, I got an X-ray. I've had serious trouble walking, and it turns out I had 2.5 inches of nail living in the sole of my foot, stabbing up into my ankle joint. I now need major surgery. FML
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Top comments
vreid 20
Nailed it.
CruelGuy 19
The pain sucks at first, but it'll be much better than the pain the swelling would have caused.
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Comments (89)
vreid 20
Nailed it.
imyy 20
Wonder if OP got a five finger discount on the procedure. (I know, I know, I'm sorry!)
Lalala579121 28
No, he only got one of his fingers discounted.
Shay_Shay97 23
That comment just made my day.
ShyVi 18
I would have commented the same thing if I wasn't so damn late.
bstarqueen 16
So bad but so good.
CruelGuy 19
The pain sucks at first, but it'll be much better than the pain the swelling would have caused.
Feklfekl2222 32
They never show that bit on the cartoons
gosh_mate 30
Oh that doesn't sound fun, are you sure there are no other treatment options? If not, then at least this will (hopefully) quicken the healing process.
EnigmaticSoul 17
Unfortunately not that I know of. I had that happen when my sister slammed two of my fingers in the hinges of a door.
gun7runner 5
the blood collection under the nail is called a subungual hematoma. the treatment of choice is trephination, or the creation of a decompressive hole in the nail plate. hot (sterile) device preferred over dirty drill bit but both accomplish same thing
ThrottleJockey 36
Yeah, I've done the drill bit in my thumb during a bowling tournament after smashing my thumb between two bowling balls. Amazingly enough, I bowled pretty well the rest of the tournament. The pain does abate pretty drastically after you relieve the pressure.
Mynamewontfi 40
Fell sick just reading that, hate it when anything happens to nails. Good luck, OP.
MegasaurusRex89 28
Aw man, I can't imagine the pain of every. single. part of that. Hope you heal quickly and got some good pain meds out of it.
Cads1 24
Stay positive, you could have crushed a bone.
iwanttogotoparis 26
Wrong nail
nodeathtoall 19
Ydi for some reason that will be cleverly explained so that you can literally be at fault for anything.
Badgero 12
Nurse trepaned my big toe with a hot paper clip. The jet of blood shot about 4 feet. But felt soooo good after. Lost the nail in the end. Gross.