Today, I nervously started a new job, and my co-workers were telling me silly rules about our boss. Later, I accidentally bumped into him, and blurted "Rule #7, don't touch George." He definitely heard. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, my manager accidentally bumped into me, brushing my behind with the back of his hand. He was a bit embarrassed, so I jokingly said, “You could at least buy me dinner first!” He went to HR and told them I made him uncomfortable. I was just trying to lighten the mood. FML
Today, I had to call a coworker to the office via the store intercom. The damn thing didn't turn off properly and everyone heard me say, "I hate that asshole. Just be where your dumb ass should be." I realized my mistake a few seconds before my manager stormed in and threatened to fire me. FML
Today, I was leaving work to go home and ran into some people setting up an event in one of our rooms. In my socially anxious way, I told them they couldn’t use our equipment by saying my boss is a massive bitch. Turns out he knows my boss and disagrees. I hope he doesn’t say anything. FML
Today, after a badly misjudged hand signal, I accidentally hit my boss in the face instead of high-fiving her. FML
Today, I was on a work call when my coworker made an accidental Freudian slip. Thinking I was muted, I muttered, "That’s what she said." I wasn’t muted. FML
Today, I was going over some paperwork with my back to my office door. As I turn around, my boss enters and says my name loudly. I was startled so bad that I jumped, yelped, and a high-pitched fart snuck out. Everyone in the office now gives prior notice before dropping by the "fart guy's" office. FML
Today, for some reason, I called my boss "Mum" in a meeting. To make it worse, I panicked and followed it up with, “Can I have a raise?” Everyone laughed except my boss. FML
Today, my boss was telling everyone that he knew a guy who went to a college at which multiple people were shot and killed recently. Being extremely socially awkward and uncomfortable, I blurted, "That's awesome." Now everyone in the office is terrified of me. FML
Today, I accidentally sent a text message meant for my best friend to my boss. The text was about how much I hated my job and my boss's constant micromanagement. FML
Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML
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Top comments
ChazzyWazzy1998 10
Rule #9, don't blurt the rules in front of the boss.
SiHa00095 15
Your boss sounds like Gibbs from NCIS with all the rules.
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Comments (64)
Evgeny2222 11
At least your working place is fun.
icefshng8 9
This sounds soo much worse because I call my manhood George lol
countryrose92 23
I call everything George. My fish is George, the last zombie in COD zombies is George, then there is Georgie porgy of call of the dead cod. George is my favorite inanimate object name as well.
gracehi 33
I named the male protagonist in my in-work novel George. But the name I choose for random shit is Fred...or Sir Galahad Bartholemew III. I hope I spelled "Bartholemew" right. I'd sure feel silly if I've been calling things by that name for all these years and can't guess how to spell it, but I've never felt compelled to actually write it before.
monpetitchevelle 4
That's hilarious!
KiddNYC1O 22
Poor George!
error404n0tf0und 21
what are the rest of the rules?!?!
baileymariee 10
I'm not sure why your mind went directly to that. You must've been pretty damn nervous.
noelasis94 18
Don't touch George in what kind of way? Sounds like a game show, and the next contestant on dont touch George is?
Caelophile 8
Frankly I'm impressed you were already so familiar with the rules that you could accidentally blurt the right one out with its number and everything.
strayaway 12
Rule #8 dont blurt rules out loud
Schiffy 18
Rule #34: Don't make **** of George.
gracehi 33
So that's where your mind went, huh? The world must be a delightful smorgasbord of perverted possibilities to you.