Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was mugged in a public bathroom. All I had on me was a plastic sheriff's badge, so I gave it to them. They laughed me out of the restroom. FML
Today, in a public toilet, I got to experience a guy high out of his mind kicking in my locked stall door and puking all over me. FML
Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet when a dude broke into my stall, screamed, "No time to explain!" and ran out with a toilet paper roll. FML
Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML
Today, I was taking a dump in the bathroom. The lights turned off and I was too embarrassed to come out of the stall. The janitor walked in, turned the lights on and asked If anyone was there. I stayed quiet. He turned the lights back off and locked me in the bathroom. FML
Today, I walked into a public toilet and I opened a stall door, only to discover someone who had forgotten to lock the door sitting on the can. Instead of saying "Sorry," I panicked and said, "Nice shoes!" I then had to wait until they left because I was too embarrassed to face them. FML
Today, I was in a public toilet taking a dump. I then noticed someone trying to peep under the door, so I kicked them in the head as hard as I could. Turned out it was a 5-year-old looking for his parent. FML
Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML
Today, I was pooping in a public toilet and a kid had walked in on me. I then heard him tell his dad, "It's okay, I didn't see anything, he was fat so his chubby legs hid it." FML
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Top comments
satanic_fml 13
the ****??
skinthesnakes 6
should have been like i plead the 5th and sat there silent as he listens to your shit sounds.
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Comments (214)
satanic_fml 13
the ****??
melonxxda 0
I doubt this actually happened....
kippyco 6
Yay south park
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
What if OP was dressed up as Mr.Slave?
DrIDGAF 7
This is another reason not to shit in public restrooms.
zachherbert 10
The many reasons not to shit in public restrooms: -may run out of toilet paper. Stuck having to use a sock. -seats are never clean. -Boners is always watching...Always -may be asked to show the location of a butt rummaging gerbil. -they smell like satans ass gas. -no privacy when trying to fap -did I mention Boners is watching?
jaint 0
South park FTW XD
Fapootles 0
haha that's a shitty prank ;D
crymore007 11
haha that's a shitty joke ;D
Ambient_One 15
#51 - Guys use socks for toilet paper? o.o"
StoryOfTheYear 15
You capitalized the L :o It must be real 0.0
JiggaJayZ 16
68- It's a last resort. Sometimes I double up on socks if I'm going to like a concert or fair or something
mgsoloist 14
Me.Slave takes it like a man. Jesus Chriiist.
PutItIn 8
Shoulda peed on him and said "There's Lemmiwinks!"
mgsoloist 14
90-it seems highly illogical to me that a gerbil inserted in someone's ass would magically make it's way into the urinary tract, AND not to mention, I think a gerbil coming out of a penis seems unlikely and frankly quite painful.
lovepinkandzombi 0
-.-
StoryOfTheYear 15
95- It is
Pokeemon 3
Jesus Chrithst
PutItIn 8
95 thanks for your input I don't even know who Lemmiwinks is so don't take it to serious you want logic go join a debate team
tatababe 1
86- I guess you've prepared for this
blackarrow_fml 7
I see what you did there. Have you been able to use it in casual conversation yet? ;)
TrixER 6
So,kicking down a stall and yelling at a person is considered a prank now?
hannahcorrine 0
Definition: (noun) Name of the gerbil on South Park that was stuck in Mr. Slave's ass and proceeded on a great adventure to find freedom through the esophogus. Later named the gerbil king. Example: A gerbil.
eminemchick 19
"shove a gerbil in your ass through a tube":D
Give_Linux_A_Go 28
he quite literally scared the shit out of you! also, I do wonder what finally happened to Lemmiwinks...
Iheartfunny 1
51 1) using your shirt works better and you can always tell people you fell in some mud 2)again just cut a hole in your shirt and use in a a seat cover 3 ) I like that boners is watching its actually kind of a turn on 4) nobody can help you with that one 5) when you have been as close to satans ass as me you start to not notice it anymore 6) well I dont know about you but im not selfish and want to share my experience with the whole world 7) again HUGE TURN ON
zachherbert 10
182 I never looked at it that way! *bows* I am forever in your service.
tjv3 10
the cop is now on my hero list
hahahahepicfail 0
EMINEM BITCH
GuitarFail123 9
firsttttttyy!!!!
spyman178 0
That's a shitty situation
el_chicharito_14 0
And that was a pretty shitty joke
MILFSaregood 7
Terrible pun..take ur shit in the toilet throw it in his face and interrogate him haha
spyman178 0
Just as I thought no love for the pun
MILFSaregood 7
Cause they're the lowest form of comedy that anyone can think of
Eyeliner_fml 0
Wrong sir, I enjoyed your pun.
hellbilly205 17
I thought it was a funny pun...
F0xyTurtle 8
I can't remember a time when this was even a little bit funny...
nite66 21
I think it's pretty funny lol
dmeloccaro 5
It's an obvious pun, but still funny.
yayforcheesecake 0
so you shit in response to his prank? i don't understand
xlord 27
Maybe because it is a completely random situation where OP is in a vulnerable position.... Plus it would be scary
jaint 0
Well it's a good job he was on the then isnt it... Mhm =P
wishfulmidget 0
yeah but it doesnt make any sense...wtf about the lemmiwinks and whatnot
Jimster1712 0
Perfect meme for the perfect situation : WHAT IS THIS I DONT EVEN
Glitch333 0
179- Win.
damanipimpin 4
Athiest buttfuck
iRykeYoFace 3
First for the first time :)
borkchop1992 15
it is a good prank
MrleClochard 4
True. I don't see why you report people for pulling a prank like this...
JacksonCampbell 9
I want to do this one day.
skinthesnakes 6
should have been like i plead the 5th and sat there silent as he listens to your shit sounds.
Jaxx66 21
Problem is.... Some people can't potty with others around >_> when I hear someone outside the bathroom door I can't go anymore till they leave.
radioedit 7
What are "Lemmiwinks"?
natsaysgoveg 6
Its the name of the gerbil on South Park that was stuck in Mr. Slave's ass and proceeded on a great adventure to find freedom through the esophogus. Later named the gerbil king. A gerbil.
Lauren10102 3
I'm fairly proud that I don't know that....
jnelly66 0
He looked it up on urban dictionary
mofo123 0
Dude that's retarded I know what lemmiwinks is and I didnt look it up, I saw it on the show
korythekid 0
It's a rat from the show south park
jayyvonblood 18
It's not a ******* rat. It's a guinea pig.
Mpsteve13 7
hey... he walked in on you ********.
Lauren10102 3
Well thanks for clearing that up.
Bekeliyr 10
no shit captain obvious
glitterme 5
I am so sorry for you that is pretty shitty fyl