Today, I got written up because I took a dump at work that lasted longer than 5 minutes, and I didn't punch out for it as a "paid break." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got fired from my job. Why? Apparently, taking 10 minutes to take a shit is too long for some people. FML
Today, I got written up for “making a big show” of being exhausted at work. I was trying to hide it. FML
Today, I got called into work on my day off. I ended up being written up for being 15 minutes late to a shift I didn't even have. FML
Today, I nearly got written up for "publicly humiliating" a coworker. All because I left a note in the restroom asking whoever keeps peeing all over the floor to please be considerate of other people. FML
Today, I fell asleep while taking a dump. At work. FML
Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
Today, I got written up because apparently leaning on the counter at work is unprofessional, even if you're about to pass out and the counter is the only thing keeping you on your feet. FML
Today, I got written up at work over false accusations that I didn't do some safety tasks. The same tasks that were done before I had even arrived. FML
Today, I arrived at work and was immediately given a disciplinary write-up for being two hours late for my shift. Apparently the manager had changed my schedule that morning and failed to tell me. FML
Today, I got into trouble for sleeping at work. FML
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Top comments
bloopaloop 27
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, That’s why I poop on company time 🎶
RichardPencil 32
You get paid to shit!?!?!? Also, whose job is it to time everyone’s defecations? Would that person describe their job literally as... ...wait on it... ...shitty?
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
You get paid to shit!?!?!? Also, whose job is it to time everyone’s defecations? Would that person describe their job literally as... ...wait on it... ...shitty?
bloopaloop 27
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime, That’s why I poop on company time 🎶
honestjane 22
Boss gets a dollar, I get a dime. That's why I poop on company time.
simcityguy09 19
Your boss is legally not allowed to do that