Today, I got in line for my flight to visit a friend in England. My mom was there to see me off, and decided to shout "No sex!" while waving, in front of at least a hundred people who will very likely be sharing the transatlantic flight with me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I boarded a trans-Atlantic flight by myself, and struck up a nice conversation with the passenger across the aisle. Before we even took off, the man in front of me unbuckled, stood to face me, and asked me to please shut the hell up. "It's a 9 hour flight, and you're VERY loud!" FML
Today, after reading a sign at the airport, my 6-year-old son thought it would be funny to yell, "Daddy's got a bomb!" Airport security then tackled me to the ground. Oh, and I missed my flight and my mother's birthday. FML
Today, a woman strapped her 8-year-old son into the seat next to me on a transatlantic flight. Thinking they'd been unable to book seats together, I offered to swap seats with her. She said she'd booked it this way intentionally, because he's a "fucking brat" on flights. She was right. FML
Today, I went on a plane and was sitting next to a mom with her 12-year-oldish daughter. Apparently, they decided to have "The talk." On the plane, right next to me. I heard everything, and actually learned new things. I'm 35. FML
Today, while flying home, two little girls started chanting, "We're all going to die." I'm an extremely anxious flyer. FML
Today, my family drove me to the airport. Before they said goodbye, my mom discreetly pulled me to one side and asked if I'd remembered to pack my birth control pills. Unfortunately, my little sister heard, then chased me through the security line, yelling, "YOU'RE ON BIRTH CONTROL?!" FML
Today, I spent the busiest travel day of the year in the busiest airport in the world trapped between the decision to leave the terminal bathroom or shit my pants. Yes, I missed my flight. Sorry, mom. FML
Today, I was supposed to fly home for my dad's funeral, but the woman in the seat next to me was so obese, her bulging flesh left absolutely no way for me to sit in my seat. I complained to the stewardess, who then forced me to leave the plane just for raising my voice in frustration. FML
Today, whilst sat next to a old lady on a flight back to the UK, I exclaimed how I wished somebody would gag the crying baby a few rows behind us. Her reply was, "That's my grandson." FML
Today, I was at the airport walking around, killing time. There was a man about twenty years older than me who kept on eyeballing me, and it really wasn't flattering. I get on the plane and guess who I get to sit next to. FML
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Top comments
Jinxsie 27
So much for joining the Mile High Club. :(
Tthug 34
Who cares? The great thing about flights is you can talk about whatever you want, because it's unlikely you'll ever see any of those people again.
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Comments (59)
Bazinga_1821 16
You should've yelled back "If I can't have sex than neither can you!"
1dvs_bstd 41
Then** sorry.
Bazinga_1821 16
Oops. Sorry, didn't catch that
1dvs_bstd 41
Happens. We just went full Canadian tho
Bazinga_1821 16
It's no big deal
1dvs_bstd 41
Isn't this how mother's issues start?
HeWillBeLoved105 22
Your point?
SuperMew 22
She could have said "she has a bomb."
Mmmsushi 14
No she should not have. That's not only immature, but dangerous and stupid.
TheOnlyMizLiv 22
They didn't say she should have, they said she "could have" (trying to make light of the situation). Give'm a break! -.-
Mmmsushi 14
I really don't care what the wording is, the suggestion was still stupid. Bombs are not funny.
Steve95401 49
Unless you were planning to join the "Mile High Club", this won't cut into your sex life. Once you arrive in England, you're not likely to see the other passengers from your flight again.
Jake42100 17
Thats a little embarrassing,One the other hand I bet the people who witnessed it got a laugh out of the ordeal....
brendejafulable 41
At least she can hope.
kyndalashworth11 9
exactly what I was gonna say
AirBusDriver 23
What happens in the Lavatory at 35,000 feet over the Atlantic, stays in the Lavatory at FL350 over the Atlantic.
phaelnb 26
I'm not so sure it was inadvertently hahahahaha