Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at school, I was asked to play a complex piano piece in front of my class, teachers and guests. I nailed it, but what stood out most for everyone was how I apparently looked like I was being possessed while performing. FML
Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML
Today, I was hypnotized and talked into telling everyone truths about myself at a show my family and I went to. I don't know what I said. All I know is that my family laughs whenever I'm near them. They won't tell me what happened. FML
Today, I performed in my school's choir concert. The girl next to me started to pass out, and I grabbed her so she wouldn't hit her head. After we were done performing and the curtains closed, my choir teacher dragged me off stage and said I was getting an F for "creating a distraction". FML
Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML
Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML
Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML
Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter, followed by embarrassment. FML
Today, I was playing a virtual reality game at a gaming convention. I got so into it that I didn't realize I was screaming and flailing around in. A crowd had gathered to watch my dumbass embarrass myself. FML
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
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Top comments
4bbaf9d3caaa8f84 20
wow, that sucks. At least you didn't call out someone's name like your mom's, dog's, sister's etc...
FrootLoops_ 0
that must have been awkward afterwards :)
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Comments (294)
your_mother 0
OMFG THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER READ IN MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!
Shizden 0
damn 33 beat me
wowfmlife 0
Hahahahah I seriously laughed out loud! Omg and yeah #12, it really would
0geckofun_ 0
You can only get hypnotized if you allow yourself to be. Also, I highly doubt that a schoolchild would have enough eclat and technique to be able to truly hypnotize someone. Kids nowadays have fallen so far in maturity, there are practically no child geniuses out there like there were in my day. OP, you were probably part of a juvenile, unfunny skit. No one appreciated your misguided attempt at humor, and now you are trolling for sympathy by twisting the facts.
cstevanus 4
you are a douche. op never said he was hypnotized by a kid. so stop making assumptions. people can be hypnotized.
PerditaDessa 38
259 hypnotism is purely suggestions. One is conscious the entire time and only does what they are comfortable with doing. If you're unaware of that you know nothing of hypnotism.
withered 30
Oh ofc, the "hurr durr my generation so great, kids today oh so bad because their life standard is higher than mine was/they have all the things I wanted but never could get". For someone bragging how genius his/her generation was you sure are ignorant. Must be because you're "old" and "can't use the web" like "your generation" is unable to. Otherwise you could search in a heart beat about today's young geniuses.
annaattack 0
I meant 23 & 31 FTW
jncwmnd 0
LMAO oh this is great..r u a guy or a girl? I need a better visual of who would be humping the floor in front of a bunch of people
wowfmlife 0
Hahaha #20 And what did #23 say??
_HollieWould 0
lmfao oh wow xD that must have been quite a show for yur classmates! sucks for you tho, i'm sure the hypno dude knew it was coming tho (:
Button_x 0
#44 I highly doubt anyone would hump the floor for gags.
FrootLoops_ 0
# 23 had said * sneeze * oh sorry im allergic to bullshit but then it got moderated.