Today, I got hypnotized at my school's variety show. Apparently, when asked to do something I enjoy doing, I began to violently hump the floor. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, at school, I was asked to play a complex piano piece in front of my class, teachers and guests. I nailed it, but what stood out most for everyone was how I apparently looked like I was being possessed while performing. FML
Today, at my school's Midnight Madness, I was selected to show my school spirit in a contest. Being drunk, I decided to hump the school mascot in front of 300 people. FML
Mesmerized
Today, I was hypnotized and talked into telling everyone truths about myself at a show my family and I went to. I don't know what I said. All I know is that my family laughs whenever I'm near them. They won't tell me what happened. FML
Glee
Today, I performed in my school's choir concert. The girl next to me started to pass out, and I grabbed her so she wouldn't hit her head. After we were done performing and the curtains closed, my choir teacher dragged me off stage and said I was getting an F for "creating a distraction". FML
Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML
Today, I walked into work after being completly wasted last night. I was sitting in a meeting when all of a sudden the presenter had gotten an e-mail saying "crazy girl dances on tables at local bar". So obviously everyone wanted to watch it. That crazy girl was me. FML
Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML
Dozing off
Today, I fell asleep in class. Usually, people just sit still when asleep. Nope, not me. Not only had I been violently rocking and nodding my head, the teacher stopped class for everyone to see for 5 minutes as she made jokes. What woke me? The intense laughter, followed by embarrassment. FML
This is the future Big Tech wants
Today, I was playing a virtual reality game at a gaming convention. I got so into it that I didn't realize I was screaming and flailing around in. A crowd had gathered to watch my dumbass embarrass myself. FML
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
Top comments
4bbaf9d3caaa8f84 20
wow, that sucks. At least you didn't call out someone's name like your mom's, dog's, sister's etc...
FrootLoops_ 0
that must have been awkward afterwards :)
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Comments (294)
whimsical_fml 0
I'm calling shenanigans. I've truly been hypnotized, a hypnotist once occupied the office next to mine, and it's not like that. It's a series of strong suggestions that you're fully and completely aware during. Its purpose is to provide strong suggestions to your mind, like, to quit smoking, for instance. It can also help you to recall memories from when you were very young, which could help in a therapy session to figure out why a person has a particular fear. When I was hypnotized, I got to remember my fourth Christmas, and what I received and the paper my favorite gift was in. For all you who are feeling bad for this chump, don't. It's total bull.
peacelovemusic_fml 0
hahahhahAHAHHA
pzehtoeur 0
Embrace your testosterone. It's a great hormone. Forget about people telling you that you should be ashamed of your sexual nature.
heywood 0
If you don't think this is real you've obviously never seen a hypnotism show. Don't judge what you've never seen for yourself, or you'll just sound like a know-it-all without a clue. (The show I saw took a dozen volunteers out of the audience, all of them my classmates and a couple were my friends.)
SeattleSiren 0
Yeah, what did 23 say? I feel I missed out :P :)....
SergioFML 0
At least you didn't run to your crush and dry humped her
heywood 0
Yes hypnotism is real. There was a hypnotist that visited my college when I was a freshman and he chose about 15 random people out of the audience, a couple of them I knew. First thing he did was a simple relaxation test to see who could be hypnotized; the rest were escorted off stage. The stuff he had them do seemed to work primarily off the unconscious mind, getting people to tap into more private opinions and emotions. I was chosen to come up on stage to let one of my hypnotized classmates act out stuff his favorite actor did- he happened to choose tom cruise (lol), and in a dazed state he grabbed my arm and tried to throw me into a judo flip. It was pretty funny, and luckily I'm a big guy (as was he) so he barely got me off the ground and I wasn't hurt. It was an awesome show but my advice is don't volunteer to be hypnotized in front of an audience- you will be embarrassed.
qazqwer313 0
#116 that would have been better atleast his crush would see how he feels for her... then they could dry hump while he is unhypnotized.
kirbyviper93 0
Your life is ******... and so is the floor.
Kylias 6
Lame.