Today, I got a sunburn all over my stomach from a tanning bed. In an attempt to relieve the itching, I looked up natural treatments since we have no aloe. After trying yogurt, milk and mayo I found out that our water was shut off so the shower could be fixed. I now reek of mayo and milk. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a second degree sunburn everywhere above my waist, for which I've been using a medicated lotion. My roommate "pranked" me by switching the lotion with a similarly colored, very caustic acne wash. My chest feels like it's roasting in hell and is oozing pus and oil now. FML
Today, I got the worst sunburn I've ever had in my life, and then discovered I'm allergic to aloe when I went to treat the burn with some gel. FML
Today, I found out that I am allergic to one of the preservatives that they put in aloe. I found this out after I put some on a severe sunburn I have. Not only am I sunburned, but now I am severely itchy as well. FML
Today, I went to the store and bought some cream to help with a sunburn I'd gotten a few days ago. What's worse than having red, peeling, and painful skin? An allergic reaction on top of it. FML
Today, a day after I went to the beach and fell asleep in the sun without applying sunscreen, I woke up to find myself looking like a lobster, with the worst tan lines possible. On top of that, I had to go to a wedding, and when I walked in, my cousin asked if I had “taken a bath in some tomato soup.” FML
Today, I was getting ready for a very unpleasant doctor's appointment. I got out of the shower and used a new body spray all over my torso and arms. Turns out I'm allergic to it and now my skin is on fire, so now I get to go to an already uncomfortable appointment even more uncomfortable than I'd planned. FML
Today, I found out that the shampoo I’ve been using has yogurt in, following a prank my boyfriend did. Turns out he forgot about it and I’ve been using it for 5 days now. FML
Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML
Today, I spilled boiling water on my legs. A coworker told me that putting mustard on the burn would heal it. I ended up at the emergency room. When people walked by I could hear them say "it smells like hot dogs". FML
Today, after an extremely stressful day, I took a hot bath when I got home. I used my little sister's bubble bath to make it more enjoyable and relaxing. I then broke out in hives. I guess I'm allergic to bubble bath. FML
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Top comments
MaramaBreaksFace 0
YDI. Tanning is stupid. Seriously. Do you want skin cancer?
vvvalori 0
YDI for artificial tanning. It's worse for you than natural sunlight. And how can lying in a bed for two minutes beat walking outside? Ever? Also, even if Mayo were a remedy...why would you put it on your body????? EW.
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Comments (124)
deaditegirl 0
YDI for putting mayo on you. That's disgusting. Also, YDI for tanning.
fyourlife33 0
you definitely deserve it for rubbing mayo on yourself, everyone knows you save that for bedroom fun
jud420 0
YDI for spending money on a tanning bed instead of paying your ******* bills.
XOfiestypixie 0
uh, it says the water was off so the SHOWER COULD BE FIXED. Not because the bills weren't paid. Learn to read the whole fml.
kscott88 0
Mayonnaise is actually a very good natural relief for many things. Just because you might enjoy putting chemicals all over your skin doesn't mean the rest of us do!
bexox 0
42 - Aloe is a plant. Just sayin' I saw the leaves in the grocery store the other day.
Imawhalerider 0
get someone to lick it off
suaveneanderthal 0
how the hell is aloe not a natural treatment? just because the plant might not grow near you doesn't mean it doesn't grow somewhere
americayay 0
why didn't you just turn the water back on? it takes a main key, but i assume the water company wasn't the one who turned it off and odds are a housemate of family member did. they could just turn it back on.
mish01 0
Why assume that she had to pay bills? where did that even come from?! why do people on FMyLife just assume ALL the time, you don't know them so don't assume that they deserve it because of your bullshit.
LizBathory 0
Some people use tanning beds for medical reasons or depression so before you immediately judge someone for using one, make sure they're using it just for vanity, douchebag.
aknuth1103 6
Yet you have no smell from the yogurt?
blue8795 0
Tea. Also, smells better than the combo of mayo and milk.
MyzticHydra 0
how do you not notice your being burned... seriously?
Emberlin 0
Everyone gets burnt in the tanning bed their first time of the season. Besides, the OP should have just gone next door and used someone's hose
ashole1990 10
special. you should've just gone and bought some aloe vera. makes more sense than wasting your milk and mayo...
MaramaBreaksFace 0
YDI. Tanning is stupid. Seriously. Do you want skin cancer?
GravyIsYummy 0
You can get skin cancer from tanning in the sun too.... -_-
yolifesucks 0
What about a spray tan. cheap and no skin cancer
drinkupgorgeous 0
Most people with spray tans resemble Oompa Loompas.
Autumnatic 0
yeah but if you weren't ashamed of being your natural race and didnt try to purposely change your skin color anyway, you wouldn't get cancer from bakebed OR sun tanning. OP and everyone who tans deserves a story on this site. it's such idiocy.
yougetmecloserto 0
Ooompa Loompas? Nahh, Only cheaper spray tans tend to be a more yellowy-orange bronzer base. Quality professional spray tanners tend to only use brown-gold bronzer solution.... which tends to just make people look like they're covered in dirt.
vvvalori 0
YDI for artificial tanning. It's worse for you than natural sunlight. And how can lying in a bed for two minutes beat walking outside? Ever? Also, even if Mayo were a remedy...why would you put it on your body????? EW.
ISellHerbs 0
Fake story. It's summertime and it even in Pennsylvania there's plenty of sun. There's almost no reason to go to a tanning bed at this time of year.
Lilianna_fml 0
There are plenty of reasons to use a bed any time of year. Modesty, lack of time, desire for an even tan, et cetera.
Emberlin 0
Thank you #71! Seriously, walking outside is just as good? Okay, I do not enjoy tanlines so therefor I go to the tanning bed. I hate how I look when I'm pale, and when I'm tan I don't have to wear makeup.
maria12_fml 0
You live in Florida. It's summer. How tough could it be to get a tan?
skeez_fml 0
...it says pennsylvania, not florida.
Lilianna_fml 0
Actually, it is very hard to tan in Florida. It rains almost daily.
bexox 0
Not really. It rains a lot, sure, but not daily. I live in Florida.
Nick402 0
I guess you live in a different area in Florida than I do, because where I live, it rains almost daily.
Lilianna_fml 0
I live about an hour outside of Tampa. It's raining so often, we couldn't even mow our yard until recently.
shewasalmost18 0
i bet you smell like a tasty sandwich. mmmm
SpitFyre 0
Do you normally put milk on your sandwiches?
ohboy456 0
You sound disgusting.
Ranoona 0
yuck YDI.