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Today, I got a call saying that my son was chasing all the girls in the class with his "Sword of Death", otherwise known as my dildo. FML

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Fall

Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.

Top comments

#5, where do you expect her to keep it? In a locked safe behind the picture of Grandma and Grandad hanging at the top of the landing 7ft off the floor with a high-tech alarm system and a self-destruct mode if the fingerprint scanner recognises it to be the fingerprint of someone under the age of 18?

Antonio718 0

It wasn't being put into use anyways...

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Comments (357)

He's got a good imagination, that one. There's a story to remember. Time to burn the ***** and buy a new one (plus a simple lockbox).

That is HILARIOUS!

wow t his is y i love kids

johnson07 0

thats really funny

mndz_mkl 0

#20 lmfao

xo3velyn 0

hey to everyone out there saying kids shouldn't be on FML, im 14 and only in middleschool, and im pretty sure by now that us 'kids' have some wayyy better FML's then your "i got drunk lastnight" ones. get over yourselves, its not like were ruining this website, so theres a few exceptions like #58, shes a dumbass, but really, us 'kids' have some good things to say too.

animedemons 0

LOL!!!!! u should tell him wen he's like 16 in front of all his friends. and people, u can't hide things from kids. i think you're underestimating them, cuz they can find anything........ plus when you want to use your toys do you wannna have to remember a combination?? i know i dont. and please all of the grammar nazis here should go somewhere else to continue your little battle. we have more important things to talk about like "the legend of the 'sword of death'" lol. and kids can go on whatever sites they want. its not like theyre doing anything wrong and there gonna hear it in school anyway.

If/when #54 and other shocked scolding commenters have kids, I think I'll open up a bubblewrap and cotton wool shop, they must get through reels of it.