Today, I found out that I've been using a "Trick Scale" that my family bought to boost my self esteem so I'd think I was losing weight. I found this out at my physical, where I learned I have actually gained ten pounds. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went in for a doctor's appointment. When I got on the scale, I was really excited to see that I'd lost ten pounds since the last time I weighed myself at the gym. The doctor then severely lectured me on the fact that I had gained twenty since my visit last year. FML
Today, I stepped on the scale because I'm trying to maintain a good weight. The scale read that I had lost 6 pounds. Feeling really good about myself, I stepped off the scale only to see that the corner of the scale was sitting on the rug, making the scale mess up and tell me the wrong weight. FML
Today, stepping on a scale for the first time in years, I had to lift up my stomach to see the number. FML
Today, I received a box in the mail from my mom which I assumed was a care package. It was a scale to encourage me to lose weight. FML
Today, while getting ready for work, I realized that all my pants were getting a bit tight. When I got home from work, I went in to the bathroom and stood on the scale, which confirmed that I have gained a few pounds. I then realized that I was eating while standing on the scale. FML
Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML
Today, after taking a shower, I decided to weigh myself. Curious, I peered down. I couldn't see the scale. I am fat. FML
Today, when I stepped on the scale this morning, I broke it. Now my family won’t stop making fun of me and calling me names like "chubby" and "fatso". The scale was really old and I weigh 110 pounds. FML
Today, after I completely starved myself for a week and exercised every day in an attempt to lose weight, I instead gained 5 pounds. FML
Today, I finished the first month of a diet and exercise program designed to help me lose weight. To keep myself motivated, I have avoided the scale the entire time. I weighed myself today. I've gained 6 pounds. FML
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Top comments
AthleticSwaqq 8
*facepalm* Should've had a V8!
reaganomics 6
Placebo effect...your doing it wrong
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Comments (96)
Sarah_moustache 9
You should have came home from the doctor and said you had an STD and see how they reacted.
Torva_fml 16
How does that relate to weight? The doctor wasn't checking her ******.... And they're now referred to as STI's.
DocBastard 40
Torva - STD and STI are synonymous. No one in the health field is going to make a big deal over using one versus the other.
Sarah_moustache 9
20, its supposed to be revenge for the fake scale.
ohSNAPyall 27
How is that revenge? It makes the OP sound worse; it doesn't make the family sound bad. And when OP says "just kidding!" everyone will think she is lying because she's embarrassed about the STD.
MoNnEy_MiiTE 3
11 and 35, an S.T.I or an S.T.D varies between what you have. If you have a bacterial S.T.I or S.T.D then family members won't go as crazy because that means its curable, so you have to be specific to really freak your family out even though that's just crucial
alexh15 13
This is a weighty situation...
jillianmathers12 13
Or a heavy situation?
alexh15 13
Come on, let's keep the mood light...
Viperpilot 0
You should do what lindsy Lohan did in mean girls and give the bars that make them gain weight
GoWithTheFro 10
Fat lot of good they did you then eh? XD
jillianmathers12 13
That's so rude of your family! Just make them pay for your new scale or dieting pills!
Feklfekl2222 32
I think it's nice of the family. They were trying to boost ops confidence (the opposite of a lot of FMLs) they probably would of said so when op started actually losing weight.
Torva_fml 16
Pills don't work.
DocBastard 40
No weigh! I'd go and pound your family. I'd go talk to your Grampa - he'll understand the gravity of the situation and will probably give you some kilo advice.
benderbot19 0
Big pun!
flockz 20
G doc, that deserves a Gram-my. you spit puns so fluid-ly that it force-s me to praise your mass-ive skill. i always aweight your newton puns and how they fill the Airistotle with a giant scale of awesomeness.
beatleslover862 0
See now your the one spelling things wrong its grandpa not grampa
flockz 20
^^^^ can't tell if trolling or stupid or both.
DocBastard 40
Beatleslover - I'm going to assume you aren't quite clever enough to figure it out on your own, so I'll break it down for you nice and easy. Grampa. Gram-pa. Gram as in (noun): unit of mass. Get it? Explanations like this ruin the comedic effect, so this'll be the last time I do this for you.
Justin23L 2
Hey! I realize! :(
Hozu 3
How could you not tell that you've been gaining weight? Aren't your clothes tighter now than they were before? I can tell when I gain even 3lbs then I know that I need to change something. Yes it's a very poor "joke" that was played on you but you should have realized that something was wrong somehow.
zebrapattern 6
it's your fault for having no common sense or self-control. seriously.
YummiGummi 0
Well that had the opposite effect. Maybe try getting a scale that doubles your weight, so that whenever you use a real scale you'll feel better about yourself
hateevryone 15
don't feel bad. it's your stupid family's fault.
CoachBangWhore 5
No it's her fault. She needs to realize she isn't at the weight she wants to be at and take some action rather than complaining.