Today, I finally passed a math exam. I go home super excited to tell my mom, yelling "Mom! Guess what!?!?!" She turns to me all happy and goes "You finally got a boyfriend!?!?!?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while at a grocery store, I told my mom I had some good news. She exclaimed, "You finally got a boyfriend?!" No mom, just an A on my math test. FML
Today, I passed my math test with flying colors. My dad thought I had cheated, so he emailed the school and told them that I had. They lowered my grade. FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML
Today, my mother excitedly jumped up and down, announcing that one of her sweet younger coworkers got engaged. I wished she'd had the same reaction to my engagement when I announced it to her a few days earlier. FML
Today, I cheated on a math test by writing a couple of equations on my hand. Totally satisfied, I handed my test in, feeling like I had aced it. As I was heading toward the door, I happily waved goodbye to my teacher. She saw everything. FML
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, my mom texted me in the middle of my end of term math exam, saying it was extremely urgent and needed me to come home ASAP. While skipping my exam, I finally got home to find out my mom forgot what the emergency was. FML
Today, I got engaged to the most wonderful man in the world. I excitedly called my mom to tell her the great news, thinking she'd be excited too. Her only response? "Oh." FML
Today, I got my first big promotion at work. Excited, I shared the news with my parents. My mom responded with, "That’s nice, dear, but your sister just got engaged," and hung up to go back to celebrating with her. FML
Today, I found out that my mother has been seeing my maths teacher. I'm still failing his class. FML
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Top comments
JackFrost 0
Yeah, my mom would have done the exact same thing. In fact, she has said that before! So I know how you feel!
xXxBisouxXx 0
Ouch, Mom, shut up, life doesn't revolve around boys, I'm excited for making an acheivment that didnt involve hormones and or sluttyness, so shut up and congragulate me on an academic achievement, jeez, here I thought you zere supposed to be teaching life morals; thanks, I'm all equipped to zork at a strip club thanks to you ** for next time if there is one :P or something else... you know, whtever you want
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Comments (91)
mysecondskin 0
hahaha same thing happened to me. i got home from my fall quarter of sophomore year in college and came home, excited to tell my mom i might have a position on my favorite bio professor's research team (i got it), and as soon as i said "guess what?!" she said "you're getting married?!"
mel_ancholy 0
Happens to me all the time. >>
mattmag 0
#9 are you using a german keyboard with a switched w and z?
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
I haven't passed Geometry once. I've had a consistent F all year long. Anyway, I would have yelled at my Mom. Shit like that makes me feel pathetic because I haven't had a boyfriend yet either (I'm sixteen).
Weedjedi 0
Livin near the 44134? I help you out.
mimblewimble_fml 0
It's not that bad, geez. PS. You probably fail all your English exams, too with your lack of good punctuation, deary.
Shannn 0
Hahaha, poor kid.
Manpersonguythin 0
She needs to lower her exectations. Just kidding, rofl. But good job on the exam, and I hope your mom starts assuming less.
the_holy_one 0
thats not even an FLM.
Alanna_Vicious 0
Um no. My parents do that to me all the time. Get a sense of humor.