Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been in love with for the past two years. Five minutes in, he passed out on top of me from a pain pill overdose and had a mini seizure. He finally woke up and groans, "Those bastards! They confiscated my clothes!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, I learned that my boyfriend has narcolepsy when we were having sex and he passed out on top of me. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Today, I was having really great sex with my boyfriend. I was on top and he seemed like he was really enjoying it. Then, I realized he'd fallen asleep. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the man with whom I've been in love for months. Too bad I was too drunk to remember a thing. FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I really liked. His testicle spontaneous turned inside his sack and he blacked out from the pain. He peed my bed, and I had to rush him to the ER so they could turn it back. Had to explain to his family and doctors what happened. It was my first time meeting them. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl and she passed out about a minute in. I panicked and thought she'd died so I tried to feel for a heartbeat. She woke up 45 seconds later and accused me of fondling her breasts while she was out. Apparently she has narcolepsy. FML
Today, I had sex with this guy I had been crushing on for five years. It took longer to put my clothes back on than he lasted. FML
Today, I was having sex with a guy that I just met, and when I thought he was about to orgasm, he actually had an asthma attack. FML
Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML
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Top comments
KBeatz 5
Starts having a mini seizure? My dear, are you sure he wasn't just finishing?
MrSassypants 34
I highly doubt it. A majority of parents don't allow their child's name to be Dumbfuck.
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Comments (142)
saderboi41 10
Still counts!
babbott13 3
Wonder what he was dreaming about..:p
xgetxbentx 13
And you didn't call an ambulance why?
guicci9000 0
That would have scared the crap out of me!! #_____#
Mophasa 1
go on!
ninelives414 3
For the love of God, fall in love with someone else. This is only the beginning of a whole lot of trouble is the OD-ed on pain pills the first time you have sex...
rainbowkissies 14
sounds like a keeper....
HeartOfLead 24
I'm surprise he didn't blame you (the real culprit) for steal his clothes.
someone3225 2
Another day in the life
CeltHound 14
How old is he?!?!?