Today, I finally got the results of months of extensive psychological testing to determine why I did so well in my course but performed so terribly on the job. Turns out I'm autistic. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a guy at work pulled me aside to tell me that I probably shouldn't be working a job where I have to interact with customers, because of my autism. I don't have autism. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. Although I am very happy in a sense and feel that there is finally an explanation for the past, this issue is not conducive to my adjustment to society. FML
Today, I tried to explain autism to my classmates. One of them, a professional cunt who's always looking for an excuse to lecture people, accused me of being "ableist" because my explanations weren't accurate, and said I shouldn't explain things I don't understand. I'm actually autistic. FML
Today, I asked if my psychiatrist would test me for autism, as I believe I may have it. His response? "You probably don't. Stay off social media once in a while." Well fuck me for wanting a professional opinion I guess. FML
Today, I got to endure another "fun" team-building personality test. Like usual, it said I was defensive and using a belief that I can't follow conversations. I literally can't due to auditory processing issues. My coworkers keep assuring me it's safe to open up. Fuck psychology. FML
Today, I found out that I have been secretly paying the bills. All the psych treatments and medication tryouts I took as a kid was paid research. My parents spent all the money on themselves and they still wanted me to do the research. They also lied to my school and told them I was autistic. FML
Today, I got frustrated looking for jobs and decided to take a quiz on best-fitting careers. My results speak for themselves. FML
Today, a girl I'd been crushing on for a little while and I were talking about autism. Some of the last words she said were "I try to not find autistic people so fucking annoying, but I can't help it. But can you blame me?” I'm autistic. FML
Today, I informed my grandparents of my upcoming graduation from college. My grandma looked at me with tears in her eyes, and told me how proud she was that I was able to make it so far in spite of being autistic. I am not, nor have I ever been autistic. FML
Today, I had a job interview with a world-renowned forensic psychologist, and it fits my degree perfectly. He didn't want to hire me, but he'd like me to return as a patient. FML
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Top comments
kandysnow 18
That's nothing to be ashamed of,OP! You're still clearly very intelligent. :-) I'm sure you will do great with more training/practice. Don't give up!
littlekellilee 45
You're not wrong, but there are usually signs as a child that a parent notices and goes to a doctor for. Unfortunately you aren't born with mental or physical diseases you have printed on your chest. OP may be very low on the spectrum, meaning he's high functioning and displaying few signs, and his parent dismissed them as "quirks".
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Comments (90)
RageWolf16 31
The comments are making me so happy c:
maiziedog 8
A diagnosis doesn't change who you are. It can help you understand why you think how you do, though. :) I teach at a school that is designed for children with autism, and I love my students! About 80% of our students have autism, some have other disabilities, and some are typical. All are wonderful, with or without challenges. My school has a social skills curriculum, so we teach social skills explicitly every day. I wish all schools did this! It helps a lot! One of my students is very bright, very sensory-driven, and always on the go. He started understanding puns and sarcasm at the end of 2nd grade last year! It was awesome. I hope you realize that a diagnosis isn't a bad thing and it doesn't change who you are.
uchihastephy88 25
Today, I was strolling through FML when I saw someone had posted an FML about being autistic. Being autistic myself, I was reminded once again that most consider autism to be an embarrassment. FML
BrotherPhil 35
Congratulations! Welcome to knowing about it. (I would say welcome to being on the spectrum, but, obviously, you've been here all along). It's not as scary as Autism Squeaks make out - you just now know why you're your kind of different. Well some of it, anyway. Some of it's just the usual weird that everybody has.
caggybandicoot 34
Welcome to the club! I have autism too :-)
InsanePPG 25
There's nothing wrong with being autistic. I was diagnosed in my very early childhood, so I can only imagine the shock of finding out later in life, but all it means is that your brain is wired differently. Hopefully things will start to be easier for you now that you know. If you have an account, feel free to message me if you have any questions or just want to talk about it.
tehultimateginge 1
there's nothing wrong with that :) I'm autistic too. I have aspergers. it really helps to meet some people who have the same thing so you have someone to talk to about it
its_tuesday 6
Uhmm why is being autistic something that would cause you to say **** your life? Autism isn't a death sentence.
blackonblight 33
No, but finding out late in life something that, had you known about sooner, could have made things much easier and less confusing to you, not to mention availability of assistance you weren't aware would benefit you, it's possible to feel like much of your life was wasted trying to be someone you aren't.
blackonblight 33
The worst part about a late diagnoses is the feeling of having wasted so much time not knowing and feeling like a failure at life when in truth you just needed different accommodations. Knowing there's a name, that other people live with the same challenges, can be a huge relief. But you end up thinking "If I only knew before, maybe I would have learned how to do X or Y better"
MlleMC_fml 19
I found out I'm autistic a couple years ago during my last year in university. It was both devastating and relieving, but then it allowed me to understand myself better and to choose a job that suits my abilities. So now that you have a diagnosis, it's time to get informed and find some workarounds.