Today, I finally got the results of months of extensive psychological testing to determine why I did so well in my course but performed so terribly on the job. Turns out I'm autistic. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a guy at work pulled me aside to tell me that I probably shouldn't be working a job where I have to interact with customers, because of my autism. I don't have autism. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. Although I am very happy in a sense and feel that there is finally an explanation for the past, this issue is not conducive to my adjustment to society. FML
Today, I tried to explain autism to my classmates. One of them, a professional cunt who's always looking for an excuse to lecture people, accused me of being "ableist" because my explanations weren't accurate, and said I shouldn't explain things I don't understand. I'm actually autistic. FML
Today, I asked if my psychiatrist would test me for autism, as I believe I may have it. His response? "You probably don't. Stay off social media once in a while." Well fuck me for wanting a professional opinion I guess. FML
Today, I got to endure another "fun" team-building personality test. Like usual, it said I was defensive and using a belief that I can't follow conversations. I literally can't due to auditory processing issues. My coworkers keep assuring me it's safe to open up. Fuck psychology. FML
Today, I found out that I have been secretly paying the bills. All the psych treatments and medication tryouts I took as a kid was paid research. My parents spent all the money on themselves and they still wanted me to do the research. They also lied to my school and told them I was autistic. FML
Today, I got frustrated looking for jobs and decided to take a quiz on best-fitting careers. My results speak for themselves. FML
Today, a girl I'd been crushing on for a little while and I were talking about autism. Some of the last words she said were "I try to not find autistic people so fucking annoying, but I can't help it. But can you blame me?” I'm autistic. FML
Today, I informed my grandparents of my upcoming graduation from college. My grandma looked at me with tears in her eyes, and told me how proud she was that I was able to make it so far in spite of being autistic. I am not, nor have I ever been autistic. FML
Today, I had a job interview with a world-renowned forensic psychologist, and it fits my degree perfectly. He didn't want to hire me, but he'd like me to return as a patient. FML
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Top comments
kandysnow 18
That's nothing to be ashamed of,OP! You're still clearly very intelligent. :-) I'm sure you will do great with more training/practice. Don't give up!
littlekellilee 45
You're not wrong, but there are usually signs as a child that a parent notices and goes to a doctor for. Unfortunately you aren't born with mental or physical diseases you have printed on your chest. OP may be very low on the spectrum, meaning he's high functioning and displaying few signs, and his parent dismissed them as "quirks".
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Comments (90)
kolby12309 26
I have aspergers, and it does affect my life quite a bit. I am sociallt awkward, and my executive functioning is in the 1st percentile. it is very hard to get my schoolwork done, but i do get it done. btw most autistic people are really smart :)
JKPwnage 27
Take it from me, OP, it's not that bad. I would know.
CaroLouWho 10
Nothing to be ashamed of. I have a couple friends who are autistic and they're some of the coolest people I've ever met. Good luck.
naviajack626 16
that sucks
Ceo22 4
Could be that the tests are actually wrong.
Rababco 29
#45 Most likely not, they most likely have Aspergers/High-Functioning Autism.
Cathrin 26
Someone want to explain to me how being autistic is FML worthy?
ChickenNug 17
Hey, I'm autistic too, it's not that bad.
Felixtrash 0
It isn't that bad OP, I was diagnosed when I was nine, I'm ahead in all my high school classes and doing some college work, you just gotta find something that works for you!
blackonblight 33
Lucky you for getting a diagnosis so early. When you get it later you've developed coping mechanisms that may mask your problems without helping them, and can be detrimental to your overall mental health.
plaza249 9
hey dont be ashamed many people are smart but have autism even i do i was sad at first then you realize it's not something bad but yet another goal to push you harder
teamnikster 9
Wait, can someone explain to me how these two things relate? Educate me.
RageWolf16 31
Lots of times autistic people are very intellectual and fast learners (the training) but have trouble interacting with customers or performing duties (the job)
teamnikster 9
What is the extent of this social disconnect? I know autism has a spectrum, and is actually called Autism Spectrum Disorder, but from the cases I've had to study, the social factor would be heavily impacted in those situations.