Today, I discovered after 11 months, my girlfriend is finally ready to have sex. I discovered this by walking in on her and one of my friends. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML
Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with my girlfriend, the girl of my dreams. I undressed and, ready to step in bed with her, I see her staring at 'it'. Which was quickly followed by laughter. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been sleeping around. After telling my best friend, I also found out that he and a few others have known for the past month. He asked, shocked, "Dude, I thought you knew?" FML
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, after years of no sex, a friend of mine told me she would like some benefits. I got too excited and came before even putting it in. FML
Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML
Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend changing. She responded by screaming, throwing herself on the ground to avoid me seeing her, and crawling into the bathroom. We've been living together for two months. FML
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Top comments
HappyPanda2016 14
I hope you mean ex-girlfriend.. And ex-friend. -_-
Sinamoi 18
Saved you the trouble of having to discover who she really was before you did take that big step in your relationship. Send her ass a packin' and find someone worthy of a healthy relationship.
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Comments (163)
zombieslayer83 19
FYL, 11 months? Damn that's a long time to wait! Especially since you didn't even get it! Sorry OP!
roselyn_davis 7
11 months isn't that long. I've waited 2 and a half years.
kingmario75 5
Ex-girlfriend, and crooked nose ex-friend, correct?
yourmurderscenex 13
you live, you learn. I know its hard but there are better people in the world. lately they are harder to find but the search will be well worth it when you do find that special someone.
Zebediabolical 45
How do you date someone for 11 months and not realize she's hot for your best friend? Sorry, if you're that oblivious to what's going on, YDI.
ajnorma 16
Completely agree! I know when I have something shameful like having feelings for your boyfriends friend I do everything possible to make it obvious to everyone. All sarcasm aside I had been dating a guy and realised I had feelings for his best friend so I broke it of with him. Did he realise before I told him? No of course not how was he? When people have something to hide they will hide it.
Funkymunky1511 4
Sorry op!! Just keep moving and forget them.. U'll find your half.. Gud luck.:)
Twisted_Angel 17
I've had that happen op. my boyfriend cheated on me with someone I thought was my best friend. "thought" being the keyword in that sentence. she's probably been sleeping with him all along. move on, you'll be better off.
RosenT1990 9
Sounds as if you'd be better off without both of them in your life...
FameNFortune 12
U deserve better :)
Satoaoi 13
well First I hope you kicked them both out second time to find a new friend and a gf who isn't a total ****
FMLoverAgain 7
She's been ready. Just not for you!