Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my mom has literally spent all her savings sending money to some bullshit-peddling megachurch televangelist, who apparently told her that giving them money would ensure her future fortune. Tithings, my ass. FML
Today, my wife handed over most of our son's college fund, in cash, to an investment scammer going by the name "Herp A. Derpson". FML
Today, my mother asked me if she could borrow $200. Being the lovely daughter I am, I gave her my bank card to withdraw it herself. She gambled it away and maxed my bank account out. I had $1500 saved. FML
Today, my nosy mom opened my mail and saw how much I have in my account. She confiscated my debit card because she’s convinced no one could save that much working part time at Burger King and is demanding I confess where so much money came from. I'm moving out. Fuck her. FML
Today, I overheard my mother Skyping with her new "boyfriend" about the $1,000 she just sent him. She barely knew what internet dating was three weeks ago. FML
Today, I found out that the $200 I reluctantly gave to my mother so she could rent a house was paid to a scammer. Now she wants to live with me, in my one bedroom apartment. FML
Today, I called my mother to check up on her. Lately, she's been having some financial problems, so last week I sent her my last $100 to help her out until her next paycheck. She used the money to euthanize the family dog. FML
Today, I gave my mother a pre-prepared deposit envelope with my fortnightly wage in it, in cash. I tell her exactly where the deposit box is and what to do. I'm now desperately calling the bank because my mother accidentely put my $1200 deposit in the little trash can for receipts under the ATM. FML
Today, my sisters and I pitched together nearly $500 to send my mom to the spa for Mother's Day. We put the printed sheet with her info into a little box with our card on top. When she opened it, she freaked out and started hugging my dad. Turns out he switched the cards and took all the credit. FML
Today, my mother, who religiously checks her bank account after every purchase, then shreds her receipts, got fed up with me not doing the same. So she shredded all my piled up receipts. These include the 100s of dollars I had spent for my work, which I need the receipts to get reimbursed for. FML
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Top comments
IKickPuppiesHard 16
And he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you meddling kids!
perdix 31
Why did you stop her? That sweet lady was just trying to help out Herpie's Kids.
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Comments (160)
justanotherrando_fml 2
Maybe it's Herpe
thisblowsaton 4
So, wait, the christian fund dude knows what time the narwhol bacons?
TicklingIsFun 0
What the hell?
ty1992_farmlife 12
Is your mom blonde by any chance?.. hope she checked this guy's background alittle before signing that check
StreetReaper 9
Really? Checked his background? If she had done that, OP wouldn't have had an FML moment. I'm new to this site. Some of you people are seriously daft. Makes me glad I went to school when they taught more than self-esteem.
Person1233 13
Yep, they are all idiots. That's because 12 year olds find the app for FML and then write nonsense.
Andr913 13
38-What's scary is that #31 is 19, according to his profile.
desireev 18
WTF is up with the blonde jokes? Your ******* profile says you're a blonde! Are you calling yourself dumb? Well yes! I guess you are! Though, the difference is that you actually ARE a complete dumb ass! Regardless of your hair color! Now STFU and go get a life! And in your new life, PLEASE stay away from the FML app! Kthanksbye
Rainbow_dumpster 28
Shut up, 31. Just because someone has blonde hair doesn't make them anymore stupid or idiotic than anyone on this planet. Not everybody uses their head. A few of my colleagues are blondes and they're the smartest i've ever seen. So don't even joke about stupidity based on their hair color rather than I.Q..
portablecupid 3
Are you blonde? If she was smart enough to check the guy's background she obviously wouldn't be stupid enough to sign the cheque.
downtime 13
Blondes who get butthurt over the stereotype seem to always be the ones who it applies to the most.
cc_the_beast 6
69, although I agree with what you're saying, you need to take a ******* chill pill. Take a deep breath and put this website forum into perspective BEFORE you write a comment and make an arse of yourself. Kthanxbye!
majorasshole 4
I know his sister, Derpina.
ghostlilac 25
... Seems legit
kimono_fml 17
I know how that is. I've got a gullible, naive mom who wants to help other people too, especially "fellow Christians"
dhardesty23 8
was she writing this check to a meme?
jlh2283 1
what's your address? i would love a donation for some foundation in which i will make up once given. make sure to let me know when your out of town too. thanks!
old09 11
Wait that's not a real person? MOM CALL THE BANK!!!!
doonerz 0
trollololololol
KissMyAnthia200 12
Ew,a brony! Get the shotgun! Quickly!